Hypnosis #12: Bullets
by Ctarsis
Summary: The Yeerks have taken a primitive weapon and reformatted it to fit their needs.


  
Hypnosis #12: Bullets

  
  
Thanks to RenegadeLegacy for helping me out with a lot of these scenes. Thanks to Cheetah, my "mewse," for sitting there and staring at me until I felt guilty when I hadn't written in about a week. Thanks, finally, to the reader, who actually puts his or her self through reading this. Enjoy!

  
  
**

* * *

Chapter One – Xilite

* * *

**

I should have known that it was going to be trouble from the beginning.

Naturally, I didn't.

It was my idea. The other Animorphs warned me. But did they really expect me to listen?

"Xil, the last time the Animorphs did this..." said Rachel, for what must have been roughly the 200,000th time.

"Rachel, it will be fine," I said for the 200,000th time.

"Why did I let you talk me into this?!" she demanded as the four of us entered.

I shrugged. "How should I know?"

"Know. Know. Oh. Oh. Know-uh."

"Help," Rachel said in a despairing tone. "There's still time to back out, Xil. The movie hasn't started yet. Let's face it, by the end of the first fifteen minutes a kid will be screaming about how the strange dude is stealing his candy."

"Candy. Can-dee. Dee. Can. Dee. Candy."

"So we get to enjoy fifteen minutes," I responded.

"You are mentally ill."

"And proud of it," I returned. "So, the movie should start in what, two minutes?"

"Minutes. Min. Min-ut. Min-UT. Minute-uh. Minute."

"Are you doing that just to be annoying, because it's a stab at humor, or because you take delight from torturing us?" Rachel demanded.

"Torture. Torture. Torture-ing. Tor-TURE-ing."

"Is that an answer or are you enjoying the word?!"

"Word. Word. Wor-duh."

"YOU'RE JUST ENJOYING THE WORD OR WHAT?!"

"What. What-uh."

"IS THAT AN ANSWER?!"

"Answer. An. Swer. An-SWER. Answer-ruh."

"ARGH!"

"Shhhhhh!" some girl said, twisting around in her chair to face us.

Rachel sighed and sat back in her chair. Tobias laughed quietly as she dropped her head into her hands. "There's no hope," she murmured.

To summarize, the four of us were watching a movie. Ax was playing with every sound anyone made, and Tobias was laughing in his odd way.

In human morph, I can almost tolerate him. But as an Animorph? The hawk disgusts me.

"This popcorn is, like, old," a teenage girl complained behind me. 

Another airhead giggled.

I felt pity for the giggly airhead behind me. Didn't she know what was happening to her? That she was being caught up in popularity and cool stuff and junk from Claire's, and that it wouldn't matter in the long run?

Or did she see nothing except the guy her gaze was fixed on?

I followed her gaze. She was staring where Ax had been a second ago.

Uh-oh.

"Where did he go?!" I whispered to Rachel, who was on my right. Ax had been on my left. She probably hadn't seen anything.

"Oh, man," she moaned. "Told you."

"Oh, don't worry," Tobias muttered. "I'm giving it three seconds. Three, two, one..."

"MOMMY!" a kid screamed. "HE'S AFTER MY POPCORN!"

I burst out laughing like a total and complete idiot. Rachel cracked up and Tobias laughed in his quiet, unnatural way.

And all the while, the kid screamed.

"MOMMY!"

"GET AWAY FROM THAT CHOCOLATE!" the enraged mother yelled.

"Chocolate! Chock-lit! Cho-co-late! Cho-CO-lit!"

I gained control of myself, slid out of the aisle, and stepped forward. "I'm really sorry, ma'am. He's off his medication again."

"You shouldn't let him out in public!" she raged.

"Oh, normally we leave him in his attic, but he really likes this movie..."

"CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATE!"

"And the food..." Rachel added helpfully.

"Uh...Ax...I mean, Max...I think it's time to go..." Tobias said urgently.

"CHOCOLATE!"

"Max...ah...let's --"

"Ssssshhhhhhh! The movie's starting!"

"I thought it started five minutes ago," I muttered to Rachel.

She shrugged.

Only one thing for me to do. Ax was still screaming about chocolate. The kid was still screaming "MOMMY!" The "mommy" was screaming at Ax. And everyone else in the movie theater was screaming at us.

My eardrums were starting to throb.

I raced up to the concession stand. "Um, a small bag of popcorn, M&M's, and...uh...Skittles."

I handed the guy a ten, got the change, and raced back into the theatre -- praying that this would work.

"SECURITY!" the woman screamed.

"Ax!" I yelled, still giggling a little. This was funny, after all.

"Gimme those!" Rachel yelped. "We have to get him out of here!"

After Ax figured out that we had chocolate, we got out pretty fast.

"That was fun!" I said happily.

"I TOLD you this would happen, Xil," Rachel complained.

"Yes. And I didn't listen. And so, it worked out pretty well -- I haven't laughed that hard in weeks."

Ax had his face inside the popcorn bag. Tobias was laughing his head off. Rachel and I were giggling quietly.

By the time Jake and Marco saw us, we looked like the idiots we obviously were.

We passed the arcade. They were just coming out.

"Hey. What are you doing here?" Jake asked.

"Mmmmf!" Ax said, his head still inside the popcorn bag.

"It was her idea," Rachel said, pointing at me. I shoved her. "I tried to talk her out of it," she continued, "but she didn't listen..."

"Oh, shut up," I said good-naturedly. "It was fun."

"You need help," Jake said in disbelief.

"I know. So. Who won at the video arcade?"

"I did," they said together.

Rachel and I shot each other a look. "Uh-huh. Who lost?"

"He did," they said together.

I laughed again, quietly. Some things would never change.

**

* * *

Chapter Two – Marco

* * *

**

As we started to head home, Rachel suggested dropping by the mall.

Xilite seconded it. I don't know what a Xaralite sees in human shopping, frankly. But maybe she'd just been human too long.

She'd probably kill me if she heard me say that.

Ax agreed, probably just to see the food court.

Tobias and Jake and I groaned and made an elaborate show of protest, but finally went.

As we strolled down the hallways, I felt a bit guilty about not inviting Cassie. Then again, we hadn't known that all of us would meet up. And it wasn't _my_ job.

I was lost in my thoughts as I slammed into someone else.

"Watch it!" I snapped at whoever it was that I'd bumped into.

The "whoever" turned around to face me. "Watch it yourself," she said evenly.

She was cute.

"Hi there," I said as if the previous exchange had not happened.

"Uh.. do you need help?" she asked me. "Because, see, I seem to recall telling you to watch it. And immediately afterward, you say hi as if nothing had happened."

I winced. So many of them see through that act.

Still, I tried again. Flashing her a smile, I said, "A lot of people say I need help. Maybe you're right."

"Aren't I always?" she said sweetly.

So maybe she wasn't so mad at me after all.

I grinned again. "Hi. I'm Marco."

I heard Xilite and Rachel politely smirking behind me. I was pretty sure that Tobias would be, if he hadn't forgotten how.

And Jake? I could see him. He had a straight face plastered on like cement but his shoulders were shaking.

"I'm Sandra. I need to meet my friend in like five minutes. Bye."

Ouch. So she wasn't falling at my feet either.

"You can hang out with us until she gets here if you want," Rachel said cordially. Then she hesitated. "Who's your friend?"

"Name's Cairo," she said. I felt Xilite stiffen.

"Ex...excuse me?" she half-stammered. Now I was the one smirking. Xilite doesn't freeze up like that often.

She elbowed me practically to the floor and I shut up.

"Cairo. Something wrong with that?"

Xilite tensed again. I could see her struggling not to explode. "Of course not," she said calmly. "But you may not want to hang around her and her Sharing friends too much." She flashed a smile. "It might change your life in a few too many ways."

"Idiot," I muttered under my breath. _Oh, sure, Xaralite. And if she's a Controller, what's your plan then?_

"Yeah, they do tend to harp on that point just a little too much."

"I've noticed," she commented.

"Sandra!"

Suddenly Cairo rushed up. I immediately recognized her. Once, Xilite had posed as her twin; she'd brainwashed everyone into thinking it was the truth. Then Cairo had found out who we were. Xilite had erased her memory and then blamed herself when Cairo was recaptured.

Long story. One that greatly displayed the Xaralite's incompetence.

Another kill-me-if-she-heard-that line.

I saw the others start in recognition.

Xilite gave a cordial wave. At least she was in another human morph that Cairo didn't recognize. "Cairo, I presume?"

"Yeah. I'm Cairo. Sandra, you're late.."

"Sorry, it's not my fault this loser came up and started his sad attempts at flirting with me!"

I winced. Ouch.

"You weren't here on time, I've been looking everywhere else for you." Cairo laughed. "Okay, so, are you coming with me to that meeting? You still haven't told me whether or not you're going!"

"She's not," Xilite said, for once speaking before she thought.

Cairo looked at her strangely. "Who died and made you Empress of the Entire Universe? She gets to decide for herself, right, Sandra?"

"Right," said Sandra, who was just beginning to look a little uneasy.

Unfortunately, it was _us_ she was uneasy about.

"Cairo, how about this: Give up your own conquest of the universe and I'll give up my 'Empress' title."

Amazing how she managed to turn such a statement into a joke.

Cairo stared at her. Then, slowly, her eyes traveled to all of us.

[Okaaaay, maybe that was a dumb move,] Xilite muttered.

"Um, Cairo! Nice jacket!" Rachel blurted. "Where'd you get it?"

She looked surprised, to say the least, at the attempt to change the subject.

"Uh.. did I mention that the seven of you are insane?" Cairo said bluntly.

"No," I said weakly. "They're the insane ones." I pointed. "I'm just along for the ride."

Sandra laughed a little. Very little. "So says the guy who –"

"Sandra, let's just forget the crazy kids and go to that meeting, all right?"

"Now who's playing Empress of the Entire Universe?" Sandra muttered, but went off with Cairo.

"I'm following them," Xilite said fiercely. She started to head after them. I caught her arm.

She whirled, eyes flashing.

"Have you lost it?" I snapped. "Cairo's a Controller, Sandra's _going_ to be one, and you might have blown it for all of us!"

"Thanks for filling me in, Marco." She snorted sarcastically. "Hey, I was here, remember? So now, what are you going to do? Start a scene here in the mall or let me do what I have to do?"

"Xilite. Xil. Ite. I believe that we should not get further involved. Be. Lieve. Believe. In. Vol –"

"Will you shut up?!" Her eyes flared.

"Xilite. I've lost a sibling as well. You don't see _me_ putting the group in danger –"

"Your group, Jake. I'm not part of it. And I didn't ask you to come with me."

Before we could argue with her somewhat flawed logic, Sandra stormed out of the Gap.

Cairo was running after her, trying to argue about something.

"I have to get home!" Sandra yelled. "It's way, way past --"

"They won't care!" Cairo snapped. "Your parents won't even notice, I swear it!"

Sandra whirled to face her. "How would you know?" she said in a somewhat broken voice. "So Mom and Dad never notice anything anymore. Maybe I just don't have time for your stupid meeting!"

"Maybe if you came with us you'd be important enough for your parents to pay attention to you again!"

She stopped dead and stared.

"Stay out of it, Cairo," she warned. "I don't need your input. I don't need your club."

She stalked off, furious.

"See you at cheerleading practice tomorrow," Cairo called after her smoothly. "By then maybe you'll have come to your senses. After all, wouldn't it be great to have a family?"

"You can't do that for me!" Sandra screamed. "NO ONE CAN!"

She burst into tears and started to run.

Tobias shook his head. "So her parents are probably Controllers."

"Probably," Rachel agreed. She stared after Sandra. "Poor girl."

I knew who Rachel was thinking about. Melissa.

"Sentiment!" Xilite said in mock-horror. "Spare me!"

We stared at her, expecting her to be joking.

"What? You're fighting a war for your planet, barely surviving it, and you still feel sentiment for some kid? Are you nuts? You have bigger problems." There was a roughness, a harshness, and even a regret, somehow, in her voice.

"We're fighting a war for our planet, for people. Not for the stupid planet. For the people on it," Rachel said evenly.

She half-sneered but dropped it.

I shrugged. "The real question is, does Cairo suspect us? And the other question – why are we discussing _this_ in public?" I lowered my voice to a whisper.

"Let's split up," Xilite suggested. "And meet back at the food court. Try not to look that suspicious, I guess. We look like idiots, obvious idiots, in the middle of the mall."

"Worried about our cover?" I said sarcastically. "The one you already –"

I saw her fist clench, but she merely smiled. "Already blew? No, I'm not that worried about your cover. But I need to get some shopping done tonight. And I'm hungry."

It occurred to me to ask where she'd gotten the money, but I didn't. I probably didn't want to know.

_Stole it, most likely,_ I thought scornfully. But even I knew that she probably wouldn't stoop that low.

Probably. I was never sure.

A short girl suddenly appeared. "Hi, everyone." Her eyes took in the fact that all of us looked worried and upset, but she didn't say anything.

Was it my imagination, or did Cassie look irritated? And maybe hurt?

"Hey, Cassie," Jake said at the same time as Rachel.

"I didn't know there was a meeting today," she said in a neutral tone.

"There isn't," Tobias said, shrugging. "We met up by chance."

"Oh."

Call me suspicious, but she didn't look convinced.

"Hey, Cass, come with us," Xilite said after a moment of silence. She smiled. "We're shopping."

"I don't –" she began.

"Come with us," Rachel said sternly. "You need a dress."

A look of irritation crossed Cassie's face, but she forced a half-smile and nodded. "Okay."

"What's with her?" I wondered as soon as they were gone.

Jake shrugged, looking incredibly uncomfortable. He stared after Cassie.

"Girls, man," I said after another short silence. Another shrug. "Who can figure them out?"

**

* * *

Chapter Three – Cassie

* * *

**

Normally, I can't stand shopping with Rachel. Well, that's an exaggeration. Normally, I can't stand the clothing part, which, I know, some girls would define as shopping. But I do like talking with her.

But with Xilite there, I felt like I could barely speak without her listening.

I know I was paranoid. But something about her makes me uncomfortable. Not like she's listening, even. Just like she could be.

Man. I knew this war would take its toll someday. Now I even looked on members of our little group as possible enemies.

"This," Rachel said in delight, holding up an all-black dress with a leopard border at the bottom. She checked the price tag. "Oh yes! Only ten dollars!" she crowed. "Marked down by seven bucks!"

"You get it," I said with a shrug. "I really don't feel like shopping."

"What else is new?" Rachel laughed. "You're still trying it on."

I groaned a little but had to smile. I accepted the dress, tried it on, and actually liked it.

"Jake will love it," Xilite commented. She met my eyes. "Maybe at the dance next week...?"

Rachel looked at me expectantly as well. I suddenly felt uncomfortable. Joking around with Rachel about Jake was one thing, but Xilite?

Never.

"I don't know if I'll go," I said, shrugging as I checked my appearance in the mirror. It did look good, I had to admit that. No bird crap. No manure.

Of course, Rachel did talk me into buying it.

"So how did you all meet up?" I asked later as we headed to the food court.

Rachel laughed. "Tobias and Ax and Xilite and I all went to a movie. Introduction to human culture for Ax and Xil."

"For me?" Xilite snorted. "Two, three, four years or more among humans and you consider a _movie_ as an _introduction_?"

I scanned the mall. As usual, nothing that interested me. Except maybe that Wildlife place.

Tobias and Rachel had gone. Ax and Xilite had gone.

What about me and Jake?

Did anyone even care that I hadn't been invited? Did anyone even notice?

Okay, so I was overreacting. I made an effort to smile as we stepped into the court.

"Hey, Cassie," Jake said easily as we reached their table.

"Hi, Jake." A small blush suffused my cheeks. Not much of one, not enough for anyone to notice.

"Sit here."

I did, all thoughts of being left out forgotten.

"That's it!" Rachel said suddenly. Several heads turned to stare. She leaned forward and lowered her voice. "Other than the obvious, I remembered where I'd seen Cairo. And Sandra. They're both cheerleaders."

"What?"

"We ran into a girl named Sandra at the mall today," Xilite said tightly. "After Marco was done flirting, Cairo showed up."

I swiveled my head to stare at her. "Cairo? _The_ Cairo?"

"Nooooo," Marco drawled sarcastically. "Some other Cairo. Come on, Cass, no one else has that a name _that_ idiotic."

"Cairo is trying to convince Sandra to come to the Sharing. They had a huge scene. Sandra screaming about her family, Cairo saying – what, that Sandra wasn't _important enough_ for them?"

I shook my head. "That's awful. So many families ripped apart..."

Xilite snorted. "Not our problem. Spare the sentiment."

That earned her a few stares, which she seemed unconscious of, or indifferent to.

"Where's Ax, anyway?" I said finally.

Tobias glanced quickly to his left. He groaned.

In unison, we all turned to face Cinnabon.

"Figured," Tobias muttered.

The "crazy teenager" was trying to reach the huge cinnamon buns on the display shelves on the wall. The only thing was that the manager was in the way.

He slammed into a few tables, screamed, "CINNAMON BUNZ!" in a rather delirious tone (Ax, not the manager), and slammed into the back of someone's chair. It toppled into another and they both fell, cursing at the top of their lungs.

He – accidentally, I hoped – stepped on one of their hands. They cursed louder.

"At any rate," Xilite finished, "what are we supposed to do about Cairo and Sandra? Just one girl."

"Xilite, your priorities are so messed up," Rachel scoffed.

Just a flicker of doubt in her emerald eyes. Just a flicker, then the cold look was back. "Maybe _yours_ are."

"A big change from when you almost blew our cover twice," Marco sneered. "You were all set to run off and –"

"Yeah, well, I didn't."

"Because they came back out! You're nothing more than an emotional –"

She rose, furious. Was it just my imagination or did Rachel and Marco look smug?

Of course. Not often that one gets her that angry.

She just stood there, slightly apart from our table, ignoring the people pushing past her. One snapped at her in a foreign voice. I tried to translate it in my mind but suddenly realized it wasn't a language I'd taken.

None of us knew what to say to her sudden rising. What can you say to that?

Jake preserved his impenetrable calm. Maybe her words didn't bother him. Maybe he thought we were being foolishly sentimental over Sandra as well.

Maybe it was just something with the leaders that hardened their hearts.

I hoped not.

"Sit back down, Xilite," he said neutrally. "People could be watching."

"Do I care?"

"Thought you were concerned about –" Marco began, tone caustic.

"About what?" she challenged.

There was a long silence.

"Um, shouldn't we do something about Ax?" I offered lamely.

"Probably," Tobias said, standing. He looked as uncomfortable with the situation as I felt.

"GET OUT OF MY STORE!"

Apparently the manager had stopped trying to pacify the young lunatic and was now trying to get him out by any means possible.

"SECURITY!"

"Why did I know it was going to come to this?" Rachel muttered.

"Cinnamuuuuun," Ax cried. "Cinnamuuuuuuuun!"

The security guards, some of which had been enjoying a meal at the food court, jumped up and started to pull Ax away.

"Son," one of them said sternly, "stealing is a court offense."

"They're cinnamon buns," I said in wonder.

"Yeah, but he's a repeat offender," Marco snickered.

"Court. Off. Ense. Offen. Se. O. Fence."

"Yes, that's what I said," he confirmed, now looking somewhat disturbed.

"Saaaaaid."

"Idiot," Xilite sneered.

Yep, she was mad.

I took a moment to glance at her. She was glaring at Ax, looking utterly disgusted.

And she was supposed to like him.

She must have noticed me staring at her. She turned and met my eyes.

I shrugged for no reason, uncomfortable.

"Does he do this often?" she wondered. "What kind of an idiot has so little control?"

"Is that all you think about?" Tobias said, face as always expressionless. "Control?"

She shrugged as I had. "Just about."

Rachel made a disgusted sound. I didn't blame her.

"Where are you from, kid?" one of the others said.

"Out. Out-uh. Of state. Ate. State." Then, as an afterthought, "Of-uh."

"Out of state?" he said doubtfully.

"Yessssss. Yes-uh. Ye. Ssss."

"Uh-_huh_. Um, yes. I see," he said with a look at his companions.

"We really should do something," I suggested.

"Like what? Go up there and say, 'Hi, we know him, he's from out of planet, and we need to go now'?" Marco demanded.

"I think we need to take him to the chief," the last one said. "He's been annoying poor Mr. Smith here for ages."

"No, sir," I said, finally rushing forward. "We know his parents. We'll take him to them."

"I'm sure they'll discipline him as needed," Jake offered.

They gave us a long look.

"Sir," Xilite added, "would it be bad publicity for your department if it was reported that you seized a child for merely eating a few pastries?"

"The chief can have him sent home."

"Yeah, but are you prepared to find him a fighter for the trip?" Marco muttered.

"What was that, son?" He eyed Marco suspiciously, evidently not used to teenagers who muttered under their breath. "What was that?"

"Umm...he lives pretty far away, sir. We'll have to –"

"How about this: If he ever shows his face here again without adult supervision, I'll have him arrested," one said threateningly.

I knew it was big talk. Or at least I hoped it was. Could they really arrest a kid for that?

You never know, with cops and government these days. And the fact that "Mr. Smith" had doughnuts and cinnamon buns smeared all over his counter, and smeared on him, probably did not help Ax's public image.

Neither did the fact that he was still straining to get a cinnamon bun.

"Yes, sir," Tobias said respectfully.

"I don't know. Several customers have complained here," his friend said. "It would be a shame if this place suffered because of one teenager."

"Yeah," the other one agreed. "They make great cinnamon buns."

Ax turned back to him, eyes wide. "You enjoy – en, joy – the wondeeeerrrrrrfuuuul cinnamon bunzzz as well?"

He nodded.

I shook my head in disbelief.

Ax lunged for the cinnamon buns again while the guards were distracted.

"This is ridiculous," Xilite whispered angrily. "I'm out of here."

She turned on her heel and stalked off.

We stared at each other.

"Please, officer," I said, first to recover my voice. "We swear he won't be back –"

"NOOOO!" Ax screeched. "CINNAMON BUNZZZZZ-UH!"

The officer pulled a card out of his pocket. "Here. Try and make him an appointment."

I nodded very seriously as I accepted it.

Tobias and Jake each grabbed Ax by an arm and half-dragged him out of the food court.

I looked at the card.

"Hey. It's the number for the looney bin place," Marco observed as we walked away, pulling a very deranged Ax with us.

"The one where Edelman stayed?" Jake asked with some interest.

Marco nodded. "The place where the first war involving oatmeal was first imagined."

"Idiot!" Rachel half-yelled. "When are you going to learn to control yourself in there?!"

He was beginning to calm down, I hoped. "The sense of taste is very powerful," he said mildly. "Sense. Sen-suh. Pooooooow-er-ful."

Apparently he couldn't smell them anymore. That was good.

"Do we care?" Rachel demanded.

I checked my watch. "It's late. I need to get back."

"Yeah. My parents will be worried," Jake agreed. "To say nothing of Tom."

"He'll be worried?" Marco asked, the joke falling rather flat.

We glared at him.

"Fine. Fine. Fine. I can't make any jokes anymore." He glanced at Rachel. "Can I walk you home?"

Rachel appraised him with a glance. "Hear me, Marco: N. O. Got that?"

He pretended to be hurt. She didn't seem to care.

Not that Rachel cares about much of anything anymore.

She walked off with Tobias, who made the excuse that he needed to demorph.

"Oh, man!" I cried suddenly. "Xilite!"

Ax looked at me. "What about – a, boouuuuut – her?"

Marco started to say something. I shot him a look that clearly said "No." Ax didn't need to know why she'd stalked off.

Jake swore under his breath. "She –"

"Can take care of herself," Marco finished. "Come on, you two, Xilite's a big girl. I think she can handle the mall."

Jake and I looked at each other. Just because she was disgusted didn't mean she'd do something stupid.

He nodded. "Yeah. Come on. Let's go."

I glanced over my shoulder, half-expecting to see her watching us.

But no.

That was stupid.

And she wouldn't do anything crazy at the mall.

I hoped.

**

* * *

Chapter Four – Xilite

* * *

**

I glided through the mall.

_It's a natural action,_ I thought bitterly. I'd been human long enough. It had been long enough since I'd come here – because of those Andalites! – that I now felt as at ease in a mall as I would in a fighter.

Or more so...

But those Andalites weren't my problem at the moment. _That_ Andalite was.

Why had it so infuriated me, the way he'd lost control? Or, rather, why had it bothered me at the mall but not at the theater?

The humiliation for my actions there was already sinking in. I'd lost it myself.

I'd acted like a human!

_Isn't that what you're always doing now_? some spiteful voice in my mind asked.

I unconsciously shoved past a lady pushing a stroller. I turned to offer my apologies and backed into another person who shoved me almost to the ground.

I put my hand to my forehead, feeling a headache begin to pound. I took a deep breath and sat down on a bench. I was rattled now.

Did I wish that I didn't fit in so easily?

_At least when you're not running into people,_ I thought.

Did it bother me that people no longer stared when I spoke? Did it bother me that I'd picked up the human manner of talking?

Had I sunk so far into human culture that the reason I was angry was that I was embarrassed?

No, of course not. That wasn't it. It was that I had needed, after my encounter with Cairo, someone to be strong. Needed someone who, for once, understood that I was not indestructible.

How many lives had I lived that no one remembered?

The thought popped into my mind, and, before I could stop myself, I considered it.

The life of Cat, the first Cat. The one who had showed up on Earth. Cairo didn't remember that. The Animorphs had not known me.

And further back, the life of the Xaralite. I snorted. Rlin certainly didn't remember it. The other Xaralites certainly didn't.

I barely did. I barely made contact with that young girl.

Would she have been ashamed of me, the warrior?

My life as the – the accomplice of Thchi. But that wasn't my fault. I rushed, within my own mind, to remind myself that she still had not conquered me, not really. Not –

I laughed aloud, a sound that caused several people to stare at the girl sitting alone, laughing bitterly at her own remembrances.

Of course she had. That was only my self-defense wall of defiance.

The life of Cat, the second one. Or was it the third?

My mind spun.

Too many morphs. Too many identities. Too many...

Too many...

I needed something more. Something...someone to be strong for me in the moments when I no longer could be.

No! I would always be strong. I would not fail myself.

_Idiot!_ I wanted to scream at myself. _You're losing it **now**!_

A few guys passing glanced at me. They nodded a little. I wanted to slap them.

Appearance is all that matters to humans.

All of them.

I stood on shaky legs and made my way to the bathroom. I wanted to morph. To morph a bird or – or anything – anything at all. Just get out of this form.

No, I needed to reacquire virtually every morph, because Thchi had erased them.

I searched through the morphs that I had. Cat. Panther.

Were there others?

I paused. What about my Xaralite morphs?

Had to test.

I had a morph of the Ki. The Liakré. The Dahc. All fierce cats on my world.

I had a morph of a small insectoid.

But I didn't want that now.

I took a breath.

Some girl shoved the door of the bathroom open. She pushed past me to a stall.

_Idiot!_ I'd have morphed _there_, in plain sight!

Was I out of my mind?

I breathed in slowly, regretting it as I did so. The human bathroom did not have a pleasant smell.

I gently maneuvered the bathroom door open and stepped out.

Where was I going?

An eerie silence seemed to walk with me. I broke into a run.

It followed.

_You do not belong here, Xilite,_ a gentle voice reminded me. _You are not human. You never will be._

_Look at me!_ I screamed in response. An image of myself popped into my mind. A girl, running through the mall, trying to escape some force she felt was chasing her. Shoving past humans who could be controlled by Yeerks – likely were. Hair streaming. Shopping bags hanging off her arm.

_You do not belong here._

_I do!_

_Would you like to?_

A new question. I thought it over carefully.

It would be nice, to simply disappear into the human society. It would be nice. I would never be infested – or at least controlled – because I was still partly a Xaralite.

_Exactly. You are Xaralite._

It would be nice.

I stopped running abruptly and swerved to avoid a few head-on collisions with other humans. Or, perhaps, Controllers.

Why was I running?

Why was I here?

Why was I in this mall? On this planet?

I should go now. I should steal a Yeerk fighter and make it back. That was what I had to do.

Ax popped into my mind again, for some strange reason. I took a moment to examine the emotions that responded.

He could not control himself as a human. He was part of the race that had destroyed mine. I could not depend on him.

Could I?

The same voice laughed at me. _Don't ally with anyone, Xilite. Remain as you are, independent. You shall be strong for yourself, and no one else._

A nice image that painted. Me, alone, but happy. Not in the presence of others and unhappy. Not depending on someone else, trusting someone else.

Complete self-sufficiency.

But was it always possible?

Questions flooded my mind. I wish I could say that answers did as well.

**

* * *

Chapter Five – Alloran

* * *

**

He re-entered my brain. I immediately sensed that he was thrilled about something.

I cringed.

[Well, hello again, Andalite! Try to surmise, little Alloran, what I have just heard.]

[I would rather not know,] I said flatly. But I immediately comprehended the foolishness of my words.

[What a pity. We have...] he paused, for what must have been dramatic effect, [a new Andalite host body.]

[What?] I demanded, enraged. [And how did the Yeerk scum manage to acquire it? _Who_ is it? No, wait,] I snapped before he answered. [I don't want to know.]

[Oh, really?] he said, and I cringed.

He'd wanted me to say that.

[It is none other than Jahar-Nolina-Dirsall.]

[You're lying,] I said in a barely controlled voice. Not bad enough that I had become the first abomination, the _only_ abomination at the time. Not her. Not Jahar...

[Yes her. _Yes_ Jahar,] he sneered. [You already knew we had some presence on Andal. She almost died. How _lucky_ for her that we were there to repair her..] He laughed.

[You lie!] I screamed, past all reason. [I know you, Yeerk! You'd try any means to break the mind that still resists you! YOU LIE!]

[Do you want proof I'm not lying?]

He'd trapped me. If I said no, it was blatantly obvious I didn't believe myself. If I said yes..

[You see? Don't try your pathetic little self-deceptions.]

[Until I see her, until I have proof, I will not believe you,] I said stubbornly, trying to retreat back into my mind, to block him out.

Impossible.

He laughed again.

I heard the loud noise of a fighter. The rock dome of the pool slid open.

The Yeerk glanced up at it. Even I could admit that this most recent Yeerk work was brilliant. Besides, it was out in the human society's equivalent of wilderness. There would be no witnesses.

Even if there were, they wouldn't have the chance to spread the news.

The door of the landing commutation ship slid open.

I'd have chosen being blinded over seeing what I saw next.

She stepped out.

[There's your proof, slave.] He opened his thought-speak to include the pool. [Visser Four. I congratulate you on your...host. I'm sure she recognizes mine.]

[Visser Three.] She laughed a laugh so like his. So unlike her...host's. [Of course she does. And congratulations on being the first to acquire an Andalite -- even if my reputation will soon far exceed yours.]

Politics! Even in my state of shock I saw it ironic. Nothing exceeded the competition between one visser and another, not even the battle for a world.

[Although I doubt that will ever happen, I wish to discuss with you the tactics we will be employing on this world.. now that there are _two_ Andalite-Controllers.]

[Shut up!] I screamed blindly. [SHUT UP!]

[Now, why in the galaxy or elsewhere would I _ever_ want to do that?] he said. [I'm enjoying this too much.]

[Of course you are! You're nothing more than a sadistic slug! Why wouldn't you enjoy it?!]

As if that would bother him. It seemed to please him, actually.

[Is your host bothering you?] Visser Four inquired, cutting in on our silent arguments. [Can't you even handle your host?] She snorted. [Males! You can't even take a simple host rebellion!]

[I was merely engaging in..] – had he possessed a mouth, I'd have said he smiled wolfishly – [_conversation_.]

[Well, there's no point in speaking to a host. Cut it out in future.]

[Are _you_ giving _me_ an order?!] he roared.

[Not at all,] she said with a faint smile on her eyes, [just a bit of.. advice.]

[I do not take _advice_,] he said acidly. [You are merely Visser Four. I am Visser Three. I could have you demoted in an instant. Do not presume to offer me _advice._]

[I presume to do many things. One of which is to take the largest step that has ever been taken in the war for Earth.]

**

* * *

Chapter Six – Jake

* * *

**

"Erek planning on showing up anytime soon?" Rachel snapped impatiently.

"Probably, since he called the meeting."

My short, brief reply seemed to irritate her more, but she (thankfully) lapsed into silence.

"We are early," Xilite pointed out. "He is not late." She glanced at her watch. "Yet."

She and Ax were both in their human forms. Cassie's dad had been cleaning out stalls earlier, and none of us wanted to risk his meeting a deer-scorpion and a cat-girl.

It had been bad enough when he met Ax before and Ax claimed to be "Canadese."

Erek pushed the door open, tempering his strength so it didn't fall on the ground.

"What took you so long?" Rachel grumbled.

"Rachel, what's with you today?" Marco shot back.

"I'm missing a sale at the mall, that's what's with me today!"

"You have nothing better to do with your life?" Xilite said caustically.

"Other than fight alien invaders, no."

"Ahem."

We turned back to Erek.

"There's a new visser arriving. Has arrived, in fact, as of today."

I groaned. "Please tell me it's not a Garatron."

Erek cast a hesitant glance at Ax. "It's not a Garatron."

"Well, what is it?" Xilite said, leaning back against a stall door. A squirrel chattered curiously at her from a cage.

He hesitated again, then spoke.

"It is an Andalite."

General sensation all over the barn, Ax somewhat louder than the rest of us.

"What?!" Ax exploded. "An Andalite?! _Another_ abomination?!"

Erek nodded.

"So? Your kind will fall eventually, anyway. What does it matter as to the order in which they fall?" Xilite said with a shrug. I sent her a sharp look – recently, I'd thought that she'd at least been attempting to drop her little revenge plans. "What Andalite was it, android?"

"I have a name, Xaralite. And the Andalite was a female named Jahar-Nolina-Dirsall."

"Alloran's wife?" she and Ax voiced in unison.

I glanced at her, startled.

"I know the Andalites. I know their race, their names, their ranks. I had reason to know it."

"Ah." I let my comment end at that.

"So...what are we supposed to do about it?" she snorted. "Why do we care? Another Andalite host, big wow, we're shocked, can we get on with life now?"

"In case you've forgotten, this war _is_ our life," Marco snorted.

"Not mine," she muttered.

"As long as you fight with us, it is." I turned back to Erek. "Is there anything else?"

"Yes. Yes, there is. Visser Four – that is her rank, I'm not sure of her designation – has been setting up a plan recently. However, she has not made the news widespread. I've heard that if a Controller heard it, one that she did not want to hear it, the policy was to have him killed on sight."

"Whoa."

"Yes."

"So you don't know yet?"

"No. I was not among the fortunate few chosen to know."

"Don't you even know _when_?" Xilite snapped.

"No."

"What use is it to have a source of information if they've no more useful information to give?!"

"Chill, Xilite," I snapped.

"Chill yourself," she snorted. Then, under her breath, "Insignificant human."

"So we have to do surveillance again," Cassie mused, evidently happy to interrupt our little argument.

"If you do that, you'll probably have to visit the Yeerk pool," Erek warned. "The visser rarely comes out of there."

"Well, well, well," Rachel said, momentarily forgetting about shopping.

"Tell me one thing," Marco demanded. "Do you really enjoy that place? Or do you just pretend?"

She blinked innocently. "Me?"

"There is one other option, other than surveillance," Cassie said thoughtfully. "What if we could free Jahar?"

"How sentimental," Xilite drawled.

Cassie ignored her. "If we could manage to enter Jahar, we could find out what this little plan is and counter it."

I nodded. "It's possible. But the risks are huge."

"Yeah, well, if they carry this plan out, the risks will be even larger," Marco shot back.

Erek checked his watch. "I'm needed at a Sharing meeting. I'll gather what information I can and call one of you when I can."

"Thanks. Thanks a lot. See you then."

He nodded and took off.

"Who'd do it?"

"Morph a Yeerk?" Marco shuddered. "Ugh..."

"I could," Cassie volunteered.

"No way," Marco said immediately. "If you had to demorph..."

"Point," Xilite agreed. "I can do it. If I have to demorph, they'll either kill me or attempt to infest me. If they try to infest me, then I might end up with a Yeerk who knows about this plan, and anyway they can't control me."

"And if they kill you, small loss," Marco muttered under his breath.

"Ha, ha, ha."

"I should do it," Ax countered. "If I have to demorph, I will be an Andalite. Lite."

"And they can infest you," I pointed out.

Something like a shudder was evident. He and Xilite exchanged a short glance before he said, "It would be cowardice to refuse on the mere base of fear."

"Maybe," Rachel said evenly. "But think of it this way: If you were captured, and infested, we'd all be doomed. So my vote is for Xilite."

"I'm honored," she said drily.

[I can't be infested,] Tobias said from his perch on the rafters, speaking for the first time. He doesn't talk much anymore. [And if I have to demorph, well...]

Rachel pointedly did not meet his eyes.

"That would work," I admitted, once again hating being the leader.

"Maybe this is just suicidal," Cassie said uncomfortably.

"The stupid war is suicidal. We have to do something," Rachel argued.

"It only takes one of us."

"Maybe..." Cassie shot a glance at me. "When does Tom's Yeerk feed?"

"Two days from today," I said without thinking. For the sake of some insane hope, I kept track of his feeding times.

"Tobias and Xilite could go. Xilite could free Jahar. Tobias could free Tom." Marco snorted. "Is that what you're thinking?"

"Well, yeah," she said hesitantly.

"I appreciate the thought," I said more coldly than I'd mean to, "but it's an unnecessary risk."

"Maybe not," Xilite said, expressionless. "Tom is a high-ranking Yeerk. He and Kilan work together on many assignments, and Kilan is Visser Five. If you were able to free Tom, you would doubtless have much information."

"Yes...we would, doubtless," Marco shot back, "but not more than we can find out from Jahar."

"What do you have against it?" Cassie demanded.

"One of us is risk enough!"

"No," I said, finally voicing my actual thoughts. "Xilite and Tobias – neither of them can be infested, Xilite because she can resist, Tobias because a Yeerk can't enter a hawk."

Marco grudgingly nodded.

Xilite sighed but did not say anything. I shot her a sharp glance. What was her problem now?

"You'll need backup," Rachel said a bit too eagerly. "We should get into the bat cave and –"

[No sense risking any more of us than we need to,] Tobias corrected.

"No. You do need backup," she countered. "If you do get into trouble, we'll lose two warriors. Unless the others are down there."

"See you later," Xilite said suddenly. "I have to go."

"Fine."

She disappeared.

"I would ask her to say," Marco said calmly, "but if she's going to leave, why argue against good fortune?"

Rachel and I laughed.

Cassie looked at us in disapproval, but her eyes were laughing as well.

I thought that was strange. Did she find Xilite to be as much of an annoyance as we did?

"We'll do it after school tomorrow," I said. "No use in giving them more time to plan whatever it is."

"And at least we get to live through one more school day," Marco grumbled.

"Yeah. What could possibly happen during a school day?" Cassie laughed. "It's almost a haven."

**

* * *

Chapter Seven – Rachel

* * *

**

My eyelids sank down as I listened to the teacher's monologue. I forced them open. Couldn't get detention today. The whole mission thing...

My head began to tilt forward.

Just then the bell rang. Time for lunch.

Cassie and I sat down. I'd brought my lunch. So had every student who had brains enough to recognize that green food never tastes that good.

"Hey, there's Jake," I said, pointing. "Where's Marco?"

"Probably had to stay after school again," Cassie said absently.

"Wouldn't be the first time," I agreed. "Oh well. He always buys lunch anyway, and I suppose this means he won't die of food poisoning."

A short laugh for both of us.

"Hey," Cassie said. "Who's that?"

I followed her gaze to a tall guy with something hidden in his jacket.

"I don't know," I said. "Never seen him before."

A sly smile crossed the guy's face, as he looked around the cafeteria, his hand reaching to his coat. His eyes finally settled on one table.

Ours.

One face.

Mine.

He yanked an object out of his coat.

"Oh my..." Cassie whispered. "Is that..."

He fired.

Every single person in that cafeteria screamed. I was among them.

He hit a girl named Allison who was just passing in front of me.

Everyone screamed again. It sounded a lot like a concert.

"Stop!" Cassie screamed. "STOP!"

He fired again.

The bullet seemed to move in slow motion.

It sank into the chest of another victim.

Jake sprang up and started edging toward him.

"Jake, what are you doing," I whispered. Cassie gasped.

The boy fired again, that crazed, maniacal light in his eyes. Even from the distance away that he was, I saw it.

He wasn't looking at Jake. Not at the moment. But he would...oh, he would...

We couldn't fight this war without Jake.

Besides which, I didn't want my cousin to die.

Should I move? Leave and morph to grizzly?

No. If I morphed, they could guess that we were human, and the war for Earth was more important than a cafeteria of kids.

Kids I knew.

Kids I went to school with.

But better them than Earth.

So what was Jake doing? Getting all heroic. Nothing else.

What, was he insane?

The gunman looked around, a smile on his face that belonged more to Visser Three than anyone else. He had to be a Controller...but he couldn't be! He couldn't blow his cover like this!

He fired!

Jake fell.

"NO!" Cassie screamed.

The entire cafeteria exploded in a deafening blast of terrified shrieks, not as much for Jake as it was from fear that they would be next.

He turned to our table again and aimed.

For me.

He fired.

**

* * *

Chapter Eight – Marco

* * *

**

When the teacher finally let me out of detention, lunch was almost over.

I still thought she'd been a bit extreme. I mean, yes, I had flown a paper airplane across the room. Yes, it had hit her. Yes, it had eventually landed in the fish tank behind her. Yes, everyone had cracked up. But was that really any reason to keep me after class? I didn't think so.

I sighed. I'd missed lunch. I would have had the law on them, except that I'd have had to buy lunch and I probably would have died from food poisoning.

Detentions are all that's kept me alive.

Why don't I bring my lunch? I'm lazy.

I passed Mr. Chapman's office on the way to my next class. Why bother showing up in the cafeteria?

"Yes," a low, murmured voice was saying, "all is going as planned."

Now, kids, be honest. You have a chance to spy on your vice-principal. Do you take it?

Duh.

Okay, now, add to that that this principal is one of the most influential creatures in taking over the world.

Do you spy?

Duh.

Okay, now, add that it's your sworn duty to stop this invasion.

I trotted down the hall and picked up a phone to listen it.

Oh. He had his own line.

That was dumb.

I trotted back up the hall and huddled outside his office. Jake would have killed me for such a risk, but hey, a spying opportunity is almost always cool.

A chill went down my spine at the mere thought of what he could do to me if he found me.

Maybe not always cool.

"Yes, Visser," Chapman half-whimpered. "I am sure that the Council will be pleased." He listened for a moment. "Yes! Earth will be ours, after we take this great leap." Another period of silence. "Of course, we will dispose of her. She should not get credit for what you, oh mighty Visser, have carried out."

Who were they talking about?

"The other Visser will be killed. We will be certain of it."

The other Visser?

Mom?

"Another Andalite-Controller should not exist, you are right," Chapman carried on.

No. The new Visser. Visser Four.

"Hey, Marco?"

I sprang to my feet, self-conscious and suddenly scared. What if a Controller had found me spying on him?

Or a teacher had found me spying on the vice-principal?

But it was only Sandra, standing there, an amused smile on her face.

"Um, hi?" I squeaked, dusting off my jeans. Apparently the janitor hadn't swept the hall in a while.

"What are you doing?"

I managed a weak laugh. "Uh, hanging out?"

"You're spying on Chapman."

My blood ran cold. She probably wasn't a Controller, judging by that scene in the mall...but there was always that chance...

"Me? Spy on the vice principal?"

"Why aren't YOU at lunch? I got detention."

"So did I. What'd you do?"

"Uhhh...got into a fight?"

"With who?"

She laughed and changed the subject. "I heard about your case from Cairo. Throwing a paper airplane into the teacher's hair. Bright, Marco."

Wow. I was actually talking to a girl, and so far I hadn't been dissed too badly. This was cool.

Chapman burst out of his office, agitated.

"Marco! Sandra!" he said, endeavoring to appear calm. "What are you doing here?"

"Heading for the cafeteria?" I suggested with a voice that was a bit of a squeak.

He stared and then pointed down the hall. "It's that way."

"Oh."

"And you'd better go home. School is –" His face turned an odd shade of red. "I mean, get back to the cafeteria until it's time for your next class."

He took off in the opposite direction.

"What was that about?" Sandra wondered.

"Must be stress," I answered shakily.

The bell rang for the next class. We had the same one, so we both started heading down the hall.

No one else joined us. Then, finally, some did.

I noted that all of them were heading for the cafeteria. The next period lunch.

"Where is everyone?" Sandra wondered.

I got a really bad feeling then. I turned and stalked towards the lunchroom.

"Marco? Where are you going?"

I broke into a run and burst through the doors.

Long before I got there, I heard the screams.

**

* * *

Chapter Nine – Tobias

* * *

**

I rose on the thermals and turned to swing towards the school.

I wanted to see if I could set up a meeting with Rachel to go flying later. We hadn't done that in a while.

Of course, I knew I was setting myself up for more just-morph-human-forever crap, but hanging out with Rachel is worth it.

When I was within still a reasonably large distance of the school, I heard something.

Weird. Normally I didn't hear kid's voices this close to the school – at least not from inside the building.

And these sounded vaguely like screams.

A cold fear gripped my heart. I flew faster, forgetting in my rush to soar and flapping my wings madly.

"Noooo!" someone wailed. "Someone help us..."

I looked down. Someone was stumbling, bloody, away from the school. I didn't recognize him.

He collapsed.

I could see that the rise and fall of his chest had stopped.

I could even see the bullet.

[NO!] I shrieked, plummeting towards the school in a dive.

There was a broken window. A huge panel was missing. I could see cloth remnants on it, the same color as the guy's ripped shirt.

I could see limp forms all over the cafeteria. I searched them for hers...

Didn't see her yet. Rachel would have made it. Rachel couldn't be dead.

Students screamed. I could see them now. Some sobbed.

It vaguely reminded me of the Yeerk pool.

I didn't recognize the guy shooting. He had a mask on, one that only revealed his eyes. He was wearing dark leather, probably doing his best to impersonate some evil person from some stupid movie.

Suddenly he took aim for a table.

Fired.

A blond girl fell.

[RACHEL!] I screamed openly. [RACHEL!]

Time slowed.

She was dead!

DEAD!

I hit the gunman from behind, barely noticing when he turned and fired.

I barely noticed when I fell.

I didn't even know the world was beginning to fade. I just lay there, insensible, blind, screaming.

[RACHEL! RACHEL! RAA -]

**

* * *

Chapter Ten – Xilite

* * *

**

I slammed my fist against the branch of the tree.

"Why won't this work?" I yelled at an inquisitive squirrel. It chittered at me, then sprang further up the tree.

"Oh, yeah, that's helpful!"

It chittered proudly and sat back on its haunches.

"Earth animals," I muttered. I stared at the small laptop I'd fashioned from some files on my fighter. It had been hard, because I had to make sure I left the actual computer intact. And now I finally had it done, and I couldn't complete the stupid formula!

"I have to finish this," I muttered. "If I ever do get back to that freaking planet, I need SOME sort of defense. That's just logical."

The squirrel chattered its agreement.

"There are still bugs in the software, that has to be it," I moaned. "I've worked on this stupid formula for weeks!"

I looked at the squirrel as if it would have the answers. It looked puzzled.

_You could always ask the Andalite to look at it,_ my mind jeered.

_Not happening. A lowly Andalite would know nothing about my software._

_Sure, Xilite._

I groaned and finally closed the laptop down, annoyed. I almost threw it at the still-chattering squirrel, but I had done a lot of work on it, so I left it intact.

Besides, the squirrel was cute.

_Definitely been human too long._

You know, I'd think that a small prey animal would be terrified of me, especially in my Xaralite form that I hardly ever left. But they seemed to like me. Even the predatory animals did, especially the cats I ran across.

Weird.

I heard galloping hoof beats below me suddenly.

My tiny ears perked and I tensed.

Had to be Ax.

What had happened?

[Xilite!]

I dropped from the tree, wincing as I did. I'd forgotten how high I'd been. "What?"

[Something's wrong. Marco just found me. He and Cassie called a meeting.]

"What? What are you –"

[He sounded...upset.]

"So? Marco's a raving idiot. Didn't he at least give a _reason_?"

[No. Hurry.]

"I'm hurrying," I grumbled.

I ran as fast as I could, but my leg felt strained after the impact. It slowed me down until I was even slower than the Andalite.

Finally, we reached the barn.

I came to a stop, almost falling again. I'd have to morph to fix the damage. And I'd have to do it soon.

It was quiet inside. I looked at Ax. [Should we morph human?]

[I think so. If Cassie's father was to come in, and we were in our natural forms, we would be in great danger.]

We both began to morph. I'd acquired yet another, something I seemed to do roughly every week.

I didn't keep my Xaralite eyes anymore. I'd decided that it was foolish, especially since I'd finally figured out how to use my _xilinni_ power without them.

"Hello?" I said cautiously, stepping inside.

I heard sobs. Loud ones.

"Hey! Is anyone here?" I demanded. "Cassie?"

"X-Xilite?" she whimpered. "Ax?"

I shot Ax a look. [Whatever it is, it must be bad.]

"What happened?" Ax asked gently.

"The school..." Marco said, pale as a sheet. "Gunman..."

I felt myself freeze. I'd heard about some shootings in different areas of the country. But like the others, I'd never thought it could reach this area.

"What?"

_Brilliant comment, Xilite. Really._

"Where are Prince Jake and Rachel?" Ax demanded. "And Tobias?" I could see him consciously making an effort not to play with words this time.

Cassie exploded into more crying. Now I just felt disgusted.

That's how I am. When the most serious things happen, and someone cries over it, I feel like yelling at them. What good does crying do? You have to _do_ something about it, not just sit there and cry.

"They were shot," Marco said blankly, as though he didn't even hear what he was saying.

"Shot? Killed?" I said in disbelief. The leader, the warrior, and the hawk – killed?

Didn't seem possible.

"It feels so empty without them," Cassie whispered.

That was true. No Rachel taunting Marco. No Jake, snapping out orders.

Hard to even remember Tobias was gone. I'd never thought much of him.

But Rachel and Jake...

Rachel, as close as I'd ever had to a human friend – except perhaps Cairo – and Jake, the leader who at times reminded me so much of me...

I would miss them.

We all would.

But life happens.

And suddenly, I didn't care anymore.

"They took them down," I said, slamming my human fist into my palm. "The Yeerks had to have something to do with this."

They gave me their attention, at least.

"What? You're crazy, this would totally blow their cover," Marco shot back.

"Unless it wasn't outwardly connected with the Yeerks," I retorted. "The Sharing will have nothing to do with it, except caring for the injured families. 'Sign up here and let us help you move on.' It was them. It had to be them!"

They looked at me. Cassie's tear-stained eyes enraged me. What did she know of loss? How could she cry over a few comrades when I had seen a planet fall and not shed a tear?

"What's wrong with you?!" I yelled. "You don't sit here and cry, you do something about it!"

"What do you want us to do?!" Marco yelled back. "They're dead!"

The animals were freaking out. All around me, chaos was erupting. But I was angry, and so none of it mattered.

"Avenge them, at least!"

"Will you listen to yourself?! You're sounding like Rachel!" He bit his lip and I could have sworn I saw tears.

That just made me more angry.

"Don't you know that in your culture you shouldn't speak badly of the dead?" I asked, dropping my voice.

I could see that I'd cut deep. Deep enough to make him shut his mouth. Cassie had long since erupted into a fountain, and Ax was just standing there, strangely immobile, strangely void of emotion. Marco and I alone seemed to possess the capability to speak, and we were each making the other regret it.

"Or were those just the old times?" I continued. "Now you can curse the dead all you want, I suppose. So say it. Say everything you could never say to her for fear of being beaten up. Little Marco vs. Warrior Rachel. Good thing she never fell for you; you'll probably miss your enemy a whole lot less than you would your girlfriend –"

"Xilite, will you just shut up?!" he cried. It came out sounding like a whimper.

"Can't take the reality? They're dead, Marco. Dead. Fearless Leader and Rage Machine and Bird Boy. Dead. So what are you going to do? Sit there and _cry_ or maybe get up and get on with life?!"

"What would you know about it? You've never had friends."

"And I don't care to. But Rachel, besides Cairo, was as close as I got to a human friend. And I'm not going to let her death go unnoticed." I looked around the small group. "The Yeerk Empire's going to know they've gone too far. And they're going to know we're here."

**

* * *

Chapter Eleven – Rachel

* * *

**

I opened my eyes, something I'd thought I was never going to do again.

White walls. A too-clean smell with something else clouding the air. Something, though fainter, that I'd smelled in battle.

Blood.

"What..."

"Shhh," a nurse admonished. Her outfit looked as white as the walls. She looked as if she'd been dipped in a vat of sanitizing liquid – clean and healthy but way too starched. "We've got everything under control."

It flooded back then. I was astonished to find myself on a hospital bed until I remembered what had happened.

"Did they catch him?" I asked weakly.

A look of confusion – was that faked? – crossed her face, but then she nodded. I didn't know if she was nodding because she knew who I was talking about, if she was answering my question, or if she was nodding at something else. Then she spoke. "Yes, they caught him. The cops came."

"Good," I croaked.

"Am I going to..."

I hated myself. I'd faced death so many times in battle, but now, I was scared. Terrified. I didn't want to lose my life this way. I wanted to live, live to fight and live to face death again.

I couldn't die this way.

"No," the nurse smiled as she took a blood sample. "You'll be fine."

"The other kids?" My voice was getting more and more hoarse.

"They're fi – we don't know about them yet," she corrected herself.

I closed my eyes most of the way but peeped out through my eyelashes. The nurse gave me a bad feeling. She kept a smile on her face until she walked out the door, and then as she turned to go down the hall, a hard look covered her features.

I reopened my eyes and lay there, staring at the stark white ceiling. I could see blood seeping through the thin sheet. I closed my eyes tightly.

Should I morph? Morph, and repair all damage?

No, I couldn't. The nurse might come back in. And even if she didn't come back until I was done, she'd see that I no longer had a wound, a bandage, and that I was in perfect shape.

And if she was a Controller, she'd know...

My heart caught in my throat. We knew that one hospital had been infiltrated, a long time ago, but we'd set the place up for many, many repairs. But what if this one was as well?

What if...

I swallowed hard and winced at the pain that resulted from such a small action. A hospital of kids. Severely injured. None with the power to leave.

The perfect target.

But maybe the other kids were dead already.

Jake? What about him?

Cassie? Had she been shot?

Marco?

_At least Tobias and Ax and Xilite are safe,_ I thought to myself.

_Especially Tobias._

**

* * *

Chapter Twelve – Tobias

* * *

**

I didn't bother making an effort to thrash as a Gardens vet examined me. I just wanted her to leave, leave so I could morph. I hadn't had a chance to morph since I'd woken up. They'd constantly supervised me.

It was a miracle that I'd survived this long, they'd said. They hadn't said it with much hope of me surviving any longer.

And if I didn't find a way to morph out, I probably wouldn't.

I tried to make a pretense of doing all the normal bird things, but after a while it hurt too badly to even attempt. I hoped she could find a way to help me, if she wasn't going to leave.

My greatest fear was of coming in contact with a Controller. He would kill me. Kill me, or plant the suggestion. They knew about red-tails.

And if word got back to Visser Three, I'd have my own little torture session.

Or worse, if word got back to Taylor...

No, she wouldn't be in Taylor anymore, would she? Was it possible that Taylor had survived? If so, she'd be a deformed wreck...

I thrashed in terror at the memory. Even this pain was not equal to the pain I'd already undergone.

I'd survived that, I'd survive this.

But then, that was just torture. This was a bullet.

Two, actually. Two small bullets had lodged themselves inside my body.

I didn't know how I, a mere hawk, could have survived that. The vet I'd already seen didn't, either. But this vet seemed more informed.

I'd hoped I could see Cassie's mom, for some odd reason, but she was off work that day. I thought that maybe if Cassie's mom was here, Cassie would eventually come, too. And she would be able to get me out of there.

I whimpered as she drew some blood. Or at least, if I'd been human, it would have been a whimper. As a bird, it came out as more of a squawk.

That wasn't the hawk panicking. The hawk didn't care. It was resigned. It was beyond pain.

I, the human, was not.

The hawk didn't do hope. It probably didn't understand the hope for a tomorrow. The will to live, yes, but probably not hope.

I did have hope. A slim hope and rapidly thinning, but a hope.

Did Rachel?

Another thrash. The vet cursed under her breath and her eyes darkened as I nicked the hand just above her glove. My talon came away wet with blood and I went very, very still.

She scared me.

But Rachel. Was she okay? Would she be okay? Was she dying as a human while I lay on the wretched examination table dying like the animal I was?

She couldn't morph, not in a hospital.

Like I couldn't morph there.

"What will we do with you?" the vet muttered.

My gut clenched.

"It's probably more humane to put it out of its misery," her sidekick ventured. Her eyes, full of pity, gazed down at me.

"Probably," she agreed.

She drew out a syringe.

I went nuts.

I let out a hawk scream and flailed like a drowning man in an ocean, all the while waving my beak, trying to...to I didn't know what, but anything to live.

"If I didn't know better I'd swear it knew what that was," the younger one commented innocently.

The vet's eyes darkened yet again. "Maybe it does," she said in a hard voice. "Maybe..."

She straightened and dropped the disposable syringe in a trash can.

"Are you going to –"

"Go tell Fields that the hawk is in here."

"Why does he need to –" Seeing the murderous look her comrade sent her, she quailed. She left quickly.

The vet leaned close.

"I know what you are, Andalite."

I quivered.

"Only a sentient being would recognize that, and we know all about you. The one with power to remain in a morph over two hours." Her voice was low and guttural, reminding me of a Hork-Bajir. "Well, Visser Four can do to you what that incompetent Sub-visser Fifty-Two could never accomplish. She can break you, even if that fool couldn't. And if you do not obey her demands, she can torture you like you've never been tortured before.

"Why don't you demorph?" she jeered. "Demorph and heal yourself. Well, the bullets found us something better than twenty, forty, fifty, a thousand hosts. They found us an Andalite. The Andalite that Visser Three would kill hundreds of troops for. Of course, the visser kills hundreds of troops on a whim."

Her eyes became unfocused. She stared past me, rather than at me, but still with the intense look of predator watching prey.

"Visser Four can change that for us. She will not be so violent. With her uprising, the Yeerk empire will rise to a height that Visser Three could never bring it to –"

"Is that so?"

A man, presumably Fields, announced his presence from the doorway.

The woman paled.

"We knew that Visser Four had supporters posing as loyal comrades," he said smugly. "I have been ordered by Visser Three to find them. My rank will advance considerably because of your carelessness."

"No!" she wailed. "It's not what you think!"

He held up a tiny tape recorder. "We'll leave that to Visser Three to judge."

Her pallor increased.

"Oh, I should have let you keep talking, but I am impetuous," with the air of one confessing their greatest fault. "But I am also ambitious, and the visser likes that."

"But I have found an Andalite!" she moaned, looking as I felt: trapped, hopeless, a caged animal with the executioner's eyes already gleaming with the prospect of blood. "The visser will –"

"– compliment _me_ for my find. You are a traitor. Why make your purpose ambiguous by presenting him with proofs of treachery and supposed loyalty? I merely make his decision easier."

She whimpered, an inhuman sound of terror.

He pulled out a Dracon with one hand and held me tightly around the neck with the other. Stars exploded in my vision. The pain increased.

He touched a panel and a small hole appeared in the floor of the clinic.

"Walk."

He carried me down and held the Dracon pointed to her back.

At that moment, we shared a common feeling: fear.

Both of us were prey, and Visser Three would be the predator.

**

* * *

Chapter Thirteen – Xilite

* * *

**

I stared at the formula, then closed the document in anger.

We needed this, more than ever, now. If I could ever finish them and produce them.

Argh.

The squirrel had abandoned me that day. In my present mood, that was probably lucky for him. Or her. Whatever.

The meeting had broken up after my little statement. No one knew what to say. No one knew what to think, for that matter.

Was I the only one retaining my senses? Sure, it was awful, but we still had to fight. And they had to deal with that.

I connected to the internet. The server asked me, as it always did, who I was and told me that I didn't have an account with the service I used. I got past them, as I always did. Someday I'd configure a file to do it automatically, but for the moment, I didn't feel like going into it.

I felt like investigating this stupid shooting.

I typed in "Sharing."

I got a bunch of idiot links, and finally the one I was looking for. I clicked it.

_The Sharing: Building a Better Life._

"That's nice," I muttered to no one.

I viewed it and nearly every link connected with it, but found nothing looking even remotely guilty.

I clicked a file I'd made called "Interface."

"Interface connecting. Mindlink made," the computer announced. Loudly. I turned the volume down, feeling something approaching a chill at the fact that the computer was answering me in my own voice.

Still, I felt pride over my little Interface program. It almost had a mind of its own.

"Computer, search for 'Visser.' "

"No links found."

"Search for 'Yeerks.' "

"No links found."

"Search for any symbol in the Yeerk language," I said desperately.

"One link found."

"Yes!" I hissed in glee. "Computer, enter link."

"Connecting. Please type in the password."

I stared. "Password? Define use."

"Link requires password to enter."

"Basic assumptions?"

"It may be in the Yeerk language."

I thought for a moment. "Enter the IP address of the person who created this page. Search for details."

"Hendrick Chapman. Basic code: HTML. Javascript also used. Yeerk characters supplied by a special computer."

"Search for IP address and details."

"Computer aboard Blade ship," after a short pause.

I seethed. They were smart. I couldn't access the Blade ship from this computer, not without an interplanetary link!

"Can you attempt to supply the password?"

"Negative."

"Um..." I muttered.

"Command not recognized."

"Shut up."

It fell silent. I congratulated myself on programming this response.

"Can you enter the basic language of the document?"

"Yes. However, the commands composing the Yeerk-language portion of the page are merely written in by use of two words."

"Which are?"

It quoted them.

"Plug in those two words as a password."

"Space between them?"

"Try it both ways."

Silence. I held my breath.

"We are entering files!" it announced with a type of excitement.

I smiled. This computer was good company.

"Translation in English."

"The current events that have been imagined by Visser Four are reaping their rewards. We have taken nearly twenty hosts. However, Visser Three is not pleased with these results. A second plan is being imagined by him, and loyal spies are already watching Visser Four for any signs of betrayal of the Empire. If none are found, some will be made."

"That's all?" I asked, disappointed.

"Yes."

"Wait," I mused. "Hosts. Could it be..."

"Command not recognized," it said sardonically.

"Why did I program you to be remotely sentient?"

"Answer not known."

"Hosts. The question is, are these people joining the Sharing to get over the deaths, or..."

"Command not recognized."

"Shut up."

Deep breath. "Okay. Run a check for...the Yeerk equivalent of 'hospital.' "

"No links found."

I moaned and slowly shut down the computer.

I'd found nothing.

Except a headache.

I stared at the blank computer for a long, long time, wondering what was next.

Rachel, dead.

Jake, dead.

Tobias, dead.

The Animorphs' warrior.

Their leader.

The son of Elfangor.

Dead.

With a burst of insight somewhat fueled by anger, I turned the computer back on.

**

* * *

Chapter Fourteen – Visser Four

* * *

**

I shook my head as my Andalite fingers played over the keys. This Yeerk webpage, which really was more of the product of a human named Chapman, greatly interested me, as did the human computer that I'd altered.

As it read the small document to me in the Yeerk language, I knew that I perhaps SHOULD have been enraged. But I was only greatly amused.

Watching me for signs of betrayal!

Hah!

No, no, betrayal was not the way to ascend to the Council of Thirteen. The path that I was now on – revealing Visser Three to be guilty of noticeably slowing down the invasion, of letting the Andalite bandits go unpunished – that was the way to get to where I wanted to be.

Not betrayal.

[Ah, Esplin,] I murmured in the host's voice. [I will not be that easy to erase from your path.]

Strange that he considered me a threat, and yet my rank was one unit below his. Or perhaps it was not strange. I had advanced to the rank of visser in a time span yet unsurpassed in its small length. I was the second Andalite-Controller, it was true, but I would certainly be the most renowned when it was over.

_Hardly, arrogant filth,_ the Andalite thought. _You'll die. Die!_

Her thirst for my death might have frightened me – if I had not been in possession of my senses.

[When will you begin to understand that I can see your thoughts? Oh, I confess, I'm not that surprised, since your captivity is relatively new to you. You will eventually become accustomed to it, I promise.]

She shuddered. The mental equivalent, of course, since I had full control of the physical actions.

[You don't appreciate that thought?]

[No. Not particularly,] her voice laced with a concept that I had heard the humans call "sarcasm."

[So I feed tonight,] with a change of the subject. [So does the other visser. Perhaps you and the other crushed Andalite be able to speak to each other. Or perhaps I'll give orders and make sure that you don't.]

[He is not crushed,] she retorted. [And neither am I.]

[You don't listen to how weak your words sound, do you?] I asked pityingly. It really was sad, these self-deceptions. And although a Yeerk is not supposed to feel pity for them, I at times did, over their apparently damaged conception of their slavery and – occasionally – even over their slavery.

Of course, I would rather have starved than admitted that.

And I certainly didn't allow some type of emotion to affect me.

[Of course he is crushed,] I continued. [Who wouldn't be, the slave of that visser? He's seen more tortures of hosts and Yeerks alike than I ever expect to.]

I did not approve of torturing subjects as a rule, but when I did take it upon myself to find out what lay in their minds that they were not telling me, or to avenge a particularly horrendous act of insubordination, I was far greater in that field than Visser Three, I was sure.

[And rest assured,] I added, [that he's had more psychological torture than a being can take without becoming somewhat deranged. Not to mention that he was always particularly...unbalanced.]

She was silent at that, remembering the Hork-Bajir war and what her husband had done.

Myself, I did not see why it was such a crime. He'd deprived us of an almost infinite number of hosts. Why should such an action not be respected?

Humans and Andalites alike were amazingly sentimental. Hork-Bajir would have been, as well, but they were too feeble-minded. Too, to put it bluntly, stupid.

The Yeerks? We do what works. Ruthless is sometimes the only way to win. One Yeerk, a thousand Yeerks, can be sacrificed to benefit ten million more.

The Andalites and humans seemed to think that ten million could be endangered to save a thousand.

I took great interest in watching Jahar's thoughts. Every time she thought of the war, she was horrified by what Alloran had done. _It wasn't decent. It wasn't honorable. It wasn't respectable._

Next it would be, _it wasn't nice._

I turned my attention back to the screen. So they were watching me?

I smiled an Andalite smile.

That didn't matter. Soon enough, I would have removed the Visser from my way.

Soon. Very soon.

"Visser Four, please report to Command. Visser Four, please report to Command." A human-Controller's voice blared through the speakers.

I seethed. Visser Four, and they thought they could give me orders!

Jahar wondered – again, I felt that strange burst of pity – if Alloran would be there. Visser Three.

I could have commented on her thoughts. But for some strange reason, I didn't.

I walked slowly++, calmly, toward Command.

[So,] Visser Three sneered as I entered. [Your little project got us a mere twenty hosts!]

My face contorted with rage at the blow, but I controlled myself. [Not reckoning the ones that will join _your_ pathetic organization to "get over the deaths."]

I saw a human behind him – Chapman, presumably – wince at the mention of the Sharing being titled "pathetic" by a Visser.

I suppose everyone needs a project.

[Perhaps, if we are lucky, fifty! Hardly the results I expected!]

I bristled. [You never expected more. You're thrilled with the fact that it did not bring too many in. If it had, I might perhaps have been promoted, and we would not like that, would we, Esplin?]

His face registered shock. But a shock that only gave me confidence to continue.

[If either of us, it is you who is the traitor of the great empire. And not I. Perhaps _you_ should be watched.]

I cursed myself. Stupid. I'd played all my advantages and let him know that I knew about the webpage. We were therefore on equal ground, neither having any secrets.

He stared at me for a long time, and then he laughed.

[I! Betray the empire! Hardly.]

I smiled. He knew that if I shared my thoughts with the Council, he could be in great danger – both his life and his position. I could reveal the webpage that pointed directly to his Blade ship as the main computer that formulated the Yeerk language portion of it.

[Perhaps, Visser, you have not heard that my "little project" also gained us an Andalite?]

He stopped dead in the middle of his laughter. [What?!]

Ah, so I had not lost all my advantages.

[Yes. An Andalite. One of those Andalite bandits that have so escaped you.]

He scraped a hoof on the floor in impatience.

[One of my underlings found it and identified it. One of yours discovered that she supported me, and therefore she was killed. However, your little underling was unexplainably found dead as well.]

[Yes, yes, and the Andalite?]

I had to admire that. He did not explode because his subordinate had been killed. He merely kept his mind on the goal – the Andalite.

He was smarter than I had thought.

[The Andalite,] I replied, [is in my quarters.]

[What form is it in?]

[That of a hawk. A red-tail.]

Chapman made a movement of enthusiasm. "Visser! That is the Andalite capable of staying over –"

He calmly _fwapp_ed his tail blade to the human-Controller's throat. [Never interrupt me, Iniss two-two-six. Never.]

He turned back to me, releasing the human, and Chapman wobbled on his feet. He sank down in fear.

I detested cowards.

[You manage your inferiors well.]

He nodded curtly. I recognized it as a human guesture.

[He implies that this Andalite has special abilities?] said I, pointing with my tail blade to Chapman. He moaned in uneasiness as I jabbed it at him.

For some reason, my action made me uncomfortable. He was a sentient being. I had no right to terrify him.

I shook it off.

[It apparently, according to these incompetents, has the ability to remain in morph over two hours.]

[That's impossible,] I shot back. [There has to be some other explanation!]

[It has been tortured. We thought that might make him reveal all. It did not. Of course, the inadequate fool who tortured him was just that: a fool.]

[What has been done with her?]

[She was given a second chance. She failed. Her host body was almost killed, but she remains in it, the owner of a blackened, deformed human with a fading mind.] He laughed cruelly. [Not many who fail me live, but I took pity on her.]

[How kind of you,] I said acidly. A punishment like that sickened me even more than a simple murder would. I felt Jahar's surprise that it would bother me and chose to ignore her.

[Ah, yes. An act of kindness. I'm known for those.]

Was that humor or sarcasm? I often could not tell the difference, if there was one, which I was not completely sure of.

[Let us agree that my "little project," as you term it, was successful, since it accomplished what you since your arrival have not been able to.]

He nodded. Grudgingly.

[And let us agree] – oh, this statement was horrendous to make! – [to work together in the future. There are two vissers here now, Esplin. You must see that the Council of Thirteen would not have sent _me_ if they did not doubt _you._]

His eyes were inflamed with fire. He made no comment.

[I want power. You want power. You run the risk of being demoted by being so incompetent, or at least unsuccessful. And I, without eyes drawn to Earth, may not advance far either. Power, Visser, it's the word that links us.]

To my surprise, he laughed again. Not mockingly. [You are perceptive. And you are right.]

_This is making history,_ I thought somewhat sardonically. _A male, admitting this!_

[You!] I snapped at a passing Hork-Bajir. [Get the Andalite. Bring him here. If you harm him, your punishment will not be pleasant.]

He nodded in fear and hurried away.

[It's almost a shame,] Esplin commented. [Another Andalite-Controller. I did so enjoy being the only one.]

[Ah, yes. But eventually, we'll make it onto that Xaralite planet and take them over. The first Xaralite-Controller will be even greater than the first Andalite-Controller, do you agree?]

[Yes.]

Xaralites. That word stirred something in me.

Xaralites.

FLASH!

Catlike creature. Small. A young child.

"No! Don't take her!"

*She dies, ______.*

A name I could not hear! What was that name?

"No!"

Pain! But the creature could not reach the child. It could not, not until...

Until what?

FLASH!

[What the...]

[Ah, here is the Andalite,] Visser Three commented calmly.

He reminded me of someone.

Who?

[Zren?] I said weakly.

He didn't hear me. Didn't hear me or was too focused on the hawk.

The bird was still in the Hork-Bajir's grip. Still, unblinking. But scared. The feeling emanated from it.

What was wrong with me?

[You have been to the Xaralite planet?] Jahar observed, with interest.

[No!] I snapped. [No! Shut up, slave!]

She was surprised. She shouldn't have been.

[Demorph, Andalite,] Visser Three ordered.

It was silent.

[Demorph and spare me the trouble of torturing you. It has been a busy day. And those two bullets must give you pain,] I noticed.

It stared at me.

[Will you demorph? Or are you determined to pay a visit to the torture chambers?] Visser Three said with something close to anticipation in his voice.

[Torture is preferable to infestation,] it said finally.

That voice. Sounded young. Not like an Andalite warrior. Not like an Andalite aristh, for that matter.

Not like an Andalite.

The words were right. But not the tone.

[You are terrified of us,] I remarked. [You have a right to be, I don't deny this.]

It didn't answer.

The visser slashed and sliced off half of the bird's wing.

It screamed.

Screamed, both as a hawk in our ears and as an Andalite in our heads.

[You bring it on yourself,] I said coldly. Normally this would inspire pity in me. But I was still reeling from that memory and I needed something to distract me.

This hawk would do.

"Visser Three!" a human-Controller cried, racing up. "Our webpages have been accessed!"

The visser snapped his blade to the human's throat. I blocked it. I wanted to hear what this human had to say. [I accessed them. It was not well-guarded.]

"No! We have identified your computer, but an outside source has as well."

The visser withdrew his blade. [Well, track it,] he said in a tone of one explaining basic concepts.

"We can't! It is shielded! We suspect that one of the Andalites has managed to find our data, but it's not an Andalite computer, that is clear."

[What, then? A human computer?] he demanded.

The human looked nervous. "No, it's not that either. We could have identified it if it was either of those."

[A Xaralite computer,] I said suddenly. [Those are always shielded. The concept was...] I fell silent. The image that I'd had was gone.

Me, working at a console?

Insane.

The human stared.

[There is one Xaralite on this planet,] the visser said tersely.

I stared at him. [You can't be serious.]

[We have our suspicions about her. It was rumored that she was the captain of the Xaralite fleet, who escaped and was previously believed dead.] He stared in distaste at the human. [You are dismissed. Attempt again to track it.]

He left, quivering in fear – of Visser Three, me, or the Xaralite, it was hard to tell.

Most likely the visser.

The bird seemed to have taken an interest in our conversation. It glared with its intense eyes at me, no doubt wondering...

[I am tired of this creature. Take it away and imprison it. Hold it for four hours. There must be some sort of time limit for it,] Esplin said, exasperated.

[Unless it's not an Andalite.] I returned its intense stare. [As you may or may not know, visser, the Xaralites have developed a morphing technology.]

[It was very flawed,] he answered somewhat absently. [After four hours, if the creature was still in that form, it died.]

His eyes went blank.

I stared at him. [How did you –]

What was I going to ask? How he knew?

How did _I_ know?

[Guards! Hold it for three and five sixths of an hour. At that time, bring it to me.]

A few Hork-Bajir nodded respectfully and removed the bird from our presence.

**

* * *

Chapter Fifteen – Cassie

* * *

**

BRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNG!

I picked up the phone before it could ring again. "Hello?"

"Hello, is this Cassie?"

"Yes," I said, confused.

"This is Jake's mother."

"Oh!" I said, like an idiot. "Have you heard..."

"He's not dead," she assured me. "They think that he'll be fine."

"What about Rachel? And To –" I shut up quickly. She didn't even know who Tobias was.

"Rachel will probably be okay as well. They were both hit pretty badly, but...they think that they'll be fine," she repeated in a rush.

I nodded, which didn't do much good because she could not see it. "Can...can they have visitors?"

"Tom and I are going down to see him now. His father's already down there."

I took a deep breath. "Um...tell him that I might be down a bit later."

Silence. A slight hesitation. "Actually...my husband told me that he was asking for you. Why don't you come with us?"

I blushed, thankful to be on the phone where she couldn't see the odd shade of red that my face was. "Sure."

"We'll pick you up."

We said goodbye.

I laid the phone back in its cradle. Jake's parents were nice, and they knew me. I didn't know of a lot of parents who would want to have anyone else around when they saw their son for the first time since he'd landed in the hospital.

So he'd been asking for me. The thought made me feel pretty good.

* * *

He didn't look nearly as bad as I expected him to.

When we came in, he was lying still on the hospital bed.

"He's been like that," his father told us tightly. "Drifting in and out of consciousness. He was hit pretty bad in the chest."

"I thought you said he'd be okay," Nikki said in a frightened voice, gripping her son's hand.

Tom was trying to look concerned, but there was a bored expression in his eyes. He looked uncomfortable.

"He will be okay," tiredly. "They hope."

Nikki started crying, grasping Jake's hand convulsively. Now I felt uncomfortable, like I had no right whatsoever to be there. I wasn't part of the family.

Then again, neither was Tom. Anymore.

She'd already lost one of her sons. Now, maybe she'd lose the other.

"Jake, come on," I whispered. "We need you."

Tom looked at me strangely. Apparently Jake's parents hadn't heard it.

There was a long, long silence.

I didn't know what we'd expected. For him to wake up?

So much for that.

A sympathetic-looking nurse came in. "I'm sorry, but visiting hours are over."

"But we're his parents!"

"I'm sorry." She remained inflexible.

Slowly, we all stood up and left.

"We'll take you home," Nikki said with a slight sob.

"No, um...I don't need a ride. Thanks, though."

They didn't question me. They were too worried about him.

[Cassie!]

I almost fell over. I looked around everywhere.

[Cassie! Hello! It's Xilite! I'm outside the window.]

I glanced over. A tiny hummingbird was buzzing frantically to stay up in the air.

I raced over. "What are you doing here?!" I hissed.

[Had to talk to you,] she gasped as I opened the window. [Found something. Yeerk webpage.]

Her wings hummed, but other than that, there was silence.

"You did not fly all the way here...did you?" I demanded. Of course, that was stupid. There was no way that she could have.

[Hitched a ride in your car. Wanted to talk to you before but you were leaving.]

"Okay, okay. Demorph and tell me." I shut the door of the empty hospital room. The aforesaid room looked vaguely like an office.

She demorphed to Xaralite form quickly. I glared at her.

"What if someone comes in?"

"I'm working on it!" she snapped. She began the morph to human smoothly.

I tapped my foot impatiently and cast a hesitant look at the door. I crossed back to it and locked it.

"What happened?!" I demanded as soon as she was done.

"If you'd be so kind as to give me five seconds to catch my breath, I'd tell you!" she half-yelled, glaring at me, apparently somewhat stressed.

I calmed myself visibly and waited.

"Okay. The Yeerks have a webpage." She lowered her voice. Seeing me start to speak, she added, "Not the one that you guys know about. And not a regular Sharing webpage. It's written in the Yeerk language."

"You can read that?"

"Vaguely. I programmed a computer to do it." She smiled a little, then continued. "It has some information on this little project of theirs."

" 'Of theirs'? So this whole –" I lowered my voice still more "–shoot-out thing _was_ their project?"

She nodded. "For more reasons than the obvious." Anger flashed across her face. "You do, of course, know that _everyone involved_ is alive?"

It took me a moment to catch her meaning.

"Some of them were shot in their chest, bullet _should_ have gone right through the heart. Did anyone tell you that?"

I stared at her. What was she saying?

"There's a technology. I recognized it – I worked on it," with a bitter laugh. "The Xaralites hadn't fully developed it before their capture, and the Yeerks stole the blueprints for it when..." She swallowed hard and looked away. "They stole them. And now it's fully developed."

"What technology?" I swore, which shocked her. "Just get to the point!"

"You wouldn't comprehend all the details," she half-sneered, "but the main thing is that it places the victim in a state of bio-stasis. It strongly resembles death. Those bullets? Something developed by the Yeerks, a protective covering that immediately dissolves when it meets flesh. The bio-stasis? Contained inside the bullets. Secreted into the system. Wears off, leaving a slight wound where the covering hit before it dissolved. Now, think, little Animorph. Why would the Yeerks do that?"

"No," I whispered. "Jake! Rachel! They're in here!"

"Never would have guessed. That's what you were crying your eyes out in the barn for, after all. Don't turn into a water fountain _here_. They might hear you."

"What else did the webpage say?" I said, ignoring her last statement.

She shook her head. "It's heavily encrypted. It will take me a long time to read further in." She flashed human teeth, apparently forgetting that she was not in Xaralite form. "A human computer probably couldn't do it. My computer was created mainly from my ship's computer."

"You have a ship here?!" I half-shrieked. Quietly.

Xilite shrugged. "How did you think I got here?"

"So what are we supposed to do?" I demanded.

"First? Get Jake and Rachel out of here. Second? Find Tobias. I think they have him in the Yeerk pool. The webpage gave no information about finding a hawk."

"Stupid question, but why do they bother with a webpage if human computers can't access it?" I asked.

She shrugged. "A human computer could be modified. And not all Yeerks, Cassie, live in this town. It's probably a report to...how shall I put this...out of state Controllers."

That was a startling thought. The thought that maybe the Yeerks were all over the U.S.

"Jake and Rachel can't just morph and walk out of here," I told her. "They'd know that something was weird about them. They'd find out from their families that they were okay. We can't do a thing."

She paused. "I haven't seen either of them. Is it bad?"

"I've only seen Jake. I haven't seen Rachel." Seeing her smile, I added defensively, "His family invited me."

The smile faded. "Well, how is _he_?"

"He wasn't as bad as I expected. According to his dad, he keeps 'drifting in and out of consciousness.' He didn't speak when we were there." I fell silent.

Xilite accepted that. "Well. We know where Jake and Rachel are, at least, but they could be infested at any moment. There's probably a portable Yeerk pool. They could be infested while they were unconscious, for crying out loud!"

"Yeah, and if they're infested, the rest of us will be," I said, thinking out loud.

She gave a sarcastic, bitter laugh. "Where did you _ever_ come up with that conclusion?"

I continued. "Unless they didn't remember us."

She stared. I smiled. For once I'd thought of something that she hadn't.

"Memory, Xilite, that's the key. If they didn't have that, we'd be safe."

She nodded slowly. "Okay. I can do it easily. I'll restore it later, if I have to, but this is all we can do." She looked uneasy. "I haven't tried this in ages. I hope I can do a better job than Thchi did."

I glanced at her. "What's a Thchi?"

"Oh," she said quickly, "nothing."

"Xilite..."

"Nothing you need to know about, human." Her eyes blazed. "Where's Jake? The sooner I do this, the better."

"Visiting hours are over. We'll have to morph to get in. I'll come with you."

She looked amused at that, but didn't say anything. "Fly morph?"

I nodded.

I noted that she went directly from human to fly. Hummingbird to Xaralite to human to fly.

She must have seen me staring at her. She laughed in my head. [Xaralite version of the morphing power. Form to form. Four hour time limit. One huge drawback: Over four hours and you don't become a _nothlit_. You _die._]

I shuddered.

She finished her change at the same time as I finished mine.

[Lead the way.]

I buzzed under the locked door and hovered in the hall, trying to remember his room number.

[There. I'm sure of it.] I darted in.

[Okay. Great. Gotta demorph. Is the door locked?]

[We won't know that until we demorph. I can't exactly try the handle as a fly,] I said, exasperated.

[I'll demorph first. If someone comes in, I can handle them.]

[We don't kill humans,] I warned.

[Yeah. YOU don't. Humans are to me as Hork-Bajir are to you.] She laughed.

[Xilite. If you fight with us, you fight for us, and you fight by our terms.]

[If. I fight for myself and for my race.] She was demorphing now, but we still carried on our little discussion.

[Yes. But while you're here, you also fight for us.]

[When it's convenient.] She turned huge green eyes on me, green eyes that were still those of a fly.

A chill raced up and down my spine. Or the rough equivalent of that, since I was a fly. I didn't know if it were her words that chilled me, or if it was the unearthly sight of huge green compound eyes.

Probably the eyes. I'd heard her arrogant talk before.

She tried the knob. [It's locked now.]

She walked over to the one window and closed the blinds.

I demorphed as quickly as I could.

"Okay. Now what?"

[Now we –] She fell silent, watching the motionless form on the bed. I supposed that she hadn't noticed it before.

I glanced at him just as his eyes opened slowly.

"Cassie? Xilite? What are you doing here?"

He glanced down at the wound, groaned, and sank back against the pillow.

[There's a Yeerk webpage. Gave information about this little occurrence,] Xilite informed him. [Short story: The bullets are mostly Xaralite technology that the Yeerks finished. The bullets were a hard, protective covering that dissolved on your skin, creating a realistic wound, and a gas that was secreted into your system to hold you in bio-stasis to make you appear dead. Your family knows you're here and alive. What they don't know is that you're going to be infested.]

"Infested?" he demanded, paling. He'd been through it before, I didn't wish it on him again – but what else could we _do_?

And he'd said the word loudly.

"Shhhh," I said, pointing to the door.

"Infested?"

Despite his somewhat quieter voice, he didn't sound any less horrified.

"Yeah. Infested. And you can't just morph and fly away; they'll know that you're not exactly a normal kid," I said gently.

"Who else was shot? Marco? Rachel?"

[Rachel and Tobias.] Xilite shrugged. [Tobias must have flown by and gone nuts, the idiot. Now they have him in the Yeerk pool.]

He closed his eyes. "Great."

"Yeah, wonderful," I muttered.

[There is another option,] she said hesitantly. [I could alter the memories of the hospital staff. But what about your family...?]

"That's it," I said, somewhat excitedly. "Do it."

[Then morph, Jake. We're out of here.]

**

* * *

Chapter Sixteen – Jake

* * *

**

"So you're alive, oh fearless leader," Marco commented sardonically after the initial clamor of disbelief was over.

"Yeah. Alive. Has anyone heard anything about Tobias?" I asked, looking around.

"No," said Cassie, shaking her head. "We haven't. I called Erek, but he hasn't heard anything either. Apparently none of the Chee were let in on the secret, and they don't know if that's just chance or what."

"The webpage?" I asked, looking at Xilite.

She shrugged. "None of it was written from Visser Four's sources; all of it was from Visser Three's. It said nothing about an Andalite."

Marco nodded swiftly. "And therefore, if they _have_ brought Tobias to the visser, it's been within the past hour or so. The visser wastes no time in spreading news of success."

"And it's only a matter of time," Xilite added acidly, "until that coward complies with his demands."

Rachel stared at her. "He's been tortured, Xilite, and he didn't."

Xilite's eyes narrowed. "He had the five of you as backup. He knew you'd come. Now he doesn't even know that you and Jake are alive, most likely, and he might even think that Marco and Cassie are dead as well. He'll crack."

[I very much doubt that,] inserted Ax. [I do not believe that Tobias would betray us.]

"You always think that until they do."

"Okay, whether Xilite is right or not, we still have to get Tobias out of there," I stated. "To do that, we have to get down to the Yeerk pool."

"Not to mention all the kids who will be infested because of this project. Just because _we_ escaped doesn't mean that they'll be that lucky."

Xilite, with some difficulty, repressed a comment.

I nodded. "We have to do something about them. But Tobias is priority one."

"We have to find him first," Marco said. "The Yeerk pool's huge. And you know they're going to torture him to get him to do what they want. Preferably, we find him before that."

"How?"

"I still have that tracking device," Xilite offered. "I don't know where the other tracking device or the thing that it's tracking is. So it's basically useless."

"You can't rig it to track a hawk?"

"No, Marco. I'd end up tracking every hawk in the country."

Suddenly Marco's eyes lit up. "Visser Four! She's the key. You manage to infest her host, like we were going to before this...incident...and we have all the information that we want."

[We run the risk of being trapped in Yeerk form or being infested,] Ax said tightly.

"Yeah. But it's our only chance," I said finally. "Xilite and Ax. Both of you."

"We only need one," Xilite growled.

My eyes narrowed. "Both of you. If one gets in to trouble, the other takes over."

"I can handle it!" she half-roared, apparently taking this as a personal insult.

We glared at each other. I saw her wrist blade jerk as I said, again, "Both of you."

A long silence.

Things like this had happened between us before. She hated the fact that I was the leader, and that as long as she fought with us I made the calls. She hated that.

Sometimes I think I'd love to _not_ be the leader. But I suppose some people are never happy unless they're in the spotlight.

The silence stretched forever and I noticed an odd spark in her blades. Kind of like electricity. I don't know how to explain it.

Then she nodded, slowly, grudgingly.

I'd won the little showdown. I barely repressed a smile.

"Fine. You win, _Jake_."

I noted something else in her tone. Something I couldn't place. Something a little less menacing.

"We have to act soon," I said, not acknowledging her words. "Tonight. Then, hopefully, there will be a chance to do something about the others who are going to be infested. Meet back here at eleven."

**

* * *

Chapter Seventeen – Xilite

* * *

**

I was there first. I'd been bored, and I was sick of working on that idiotic computer.

At least the Animorphs didn't know about my project. If they had, I'd get a lot of crap about not being done yet. About finding something I couldn't do.

I didn't need that.

I stretched out in the loft and waited for someone to show up.

Jake came in five minutes after I did. I checked the glowing red numbers on a clock in the barn and saw that it was only ten-fifty.

I dropped, being careful not to strain my ankle this time. "Hello, Jake. You are early."

"So are you."

I leaned back against a rail. "What's the plan? Get down there and _hope_ that it's Jahar's night to feed? What if it isn't, oh fearless leader?"

"Then we try to find Tobias ourselves. Obviously."

"And what if he's already betrayed you?"

I didn't have a high opinion of the hawk.

"Tobias isn't a complete idiot. He'd kill himself first."

"I doubt that."

"You have not known him as long as we have. You judging him is as ridiculous like me judging one of your Xaralite underlings."

"You didn't even _know_ the Xaralites. I know the hawk."

"Not as well as we do. You don't know what he's been through rather than betray us."

I shrugged and let it go at that. I'd be convinced when I saw him. That was about what it would take.

"I've acquired a Yeerk. I take it that the Andalite has?"

He nodded.

"Must be hard for you. You make a misstep, they all die," I observed.

"You learn to deal with it," he said, somewhat harshly.

"Nah. You never actually get over your misstep, once it happens," I said quietly. "You've done well, Jake. Very well. Six warriors, and not one dead yet. More than I can say," I half-muttered.

"Yeah. None of them are dead. But Tobias is trapped as a hawk and Rachel's about an inch from losing it. Marco set it up to kill his own mother."

"None of them are dead. You're not responsible for their own defects."

He ignored me, continuing. "Cassie's becoming the one thing she never wanted to be: a killer. Ax – who knows about Ax? I haven't exactly kept them all spotless, Xilite. And we're not exactly turning the tide of the war."

"You certainly have Visser Three worried, at the least. And he doesn't worry easily."

Visser Three. My father. Would worst come to worst in this battle? Would the Andalite kill him? One of the humans?

Me?

"You know what it's like to lose, Xilite. We are to the Yeerks what the Xaralites were to seven races and three powers: nothing."

I bristled at that, but this wasn't about my force. It was about his. "Hardly nothing. You've won countless battles. You're worth more than nothing."

He smiled somewhat sadly. "Probably not much."

"Jake, listen to me. You're a kid. A kid with an army of kids. And you have done to Visser Three what no other race has been able to do: You've held him off. Earth isn't lost yet."

"Yeah. Held him off. Not beaten him back."

He looked tired. Exhausted. The scars of a thousand battles evident, his life about to be scarred by one more.

"Maybe not beaten him back. Yet. But I can say this, almost with certainty: You will."

He made a bitter, ruined smile. "What's this about, Xilite? Pity?"

"No, you idiot," I snapped. I calmed myself visibly, noting that I'd acquired somewhat of a temper lately. "I don't pity you, Jake. You or your force. Frankly, for you I can say what I can say for virtually no one else: I respect you. I don't know if even I could have done what you have. I like to think so. But sometimes, I wonder. Six warriors, all kids, and you're holding off an empire. I wouldn't have thought it was possible." I smiled just a little bit, mostly to myself. "I criticize your methods enough, but you've done what would be commonly spoken of as impossible. So no, it's not about pity."

He smiled for the third time, but this time without as much sadness.

Just then, Cassie came in.

"Hey, Cassie."

"Hi."

"Hi Jake, hi Xilite. I would have been here earlier, but my parents were up late and I couldn't get out past them. No one else here yet?"

"No. No one else. Has anyone called you?" Jake asked.

"No." She checked a goose's wing, putting idle time to use.

"I'm here," Rachel announced from the doorway.

"We're dying with delight," I said sarcastically but with a smile to let her know I was joking.

"So we're only missing Marco and Ax?" she said, looking around.

Jake nodded. "Then we go."

"How are we getting in _this_ time?" She grinned.

He shrugged. "Mole tunnel."

"No Gleet BioFilters, but a bunch of robots," Cassie observed. "Robots are easier to take than filters."

Marco snuck in, just behind Rachel. I saw him, but said nothing.

"BOO!"

She jumped, then spun around and glared.

"See? Even Mighty Xena, Warrior Princess, gets nervous sometimes," he laughed, sauntering in.

I was surprised that she let him get away with it. I certainly wouldn't have.

Just behind Marco was Ax. I noticed Jake take a deep breath. We were all here. We were all ready.

All that remained was for Rachel to say her line.

"Let's do it."

* * *

[Robot,] Rachel announced. She was in the lead, which did not surprise any of us.

[Xilite. Handle it.]

I moved in front of Rachel and focused. The robot moved out of the way.

It rammed into a wall.

[That's fun!]

[See any more?] Marco asked.

I scanned the pool. [Coast is clear. I think. I'll stay in front in case more of the little disasters show up.]

[Yeah!] Marco cheered. [Then they'll shoot you dead!]

[That _would_ be a pity – I wouldn't get to do the same to _you_,] I shot back.

[Hey, do you think the two of you could cut it out?] Jake interrupted. [Xilite, is there any sign of Tobias?]

[None, fearless leader. I think I'd have told you if there was.] I looked around. [He's probably sold you out by now, anyway.]

[Just one question, Xilite: What do you have against Tobias?] Rachel demanded.

[I don't like birds. Can we move yet? I'm bored with just hovering here.]

[And we're bored with staring at you hovering there,] Marco said impatiently. [Move, already!]

I swooped down. [Hey! Whoa! Both of the vissers' hosts are loose.]

[Huh?]

[Figuratively.] I glanced down. Both of them were in chains and inside separate cages. Not exactly my description of "loose."

[You know,] I said as we spread out, looking for a trace of Tobias but also trying not to appear like we were all together, [I've never been able to figure out what the big problem was with Alloran preventing the Yeerk empire from getting more hosts than they have.]

[What?! He killed them!]

[Yeah, and as a result the Yeerk empire has fewer HB hosts.]

[Let's not get into this,] Rachel said edgily. [Can't we all fight this little moral question out _later_, if we _survive_?]

[Yeah. Xilite, Ax, move out. We'll cover you.]

[Hah! You're bats! What can _you_ do that _we_ can't?!] I challenged.

He let that go, probably because there was nothing to say.

I dived. Sharply. Straight into the sludge.

Ick.

[They're sending Taxxons in after you,] Cassie said tersely.

Just like we'd thought they would. I struggled to get further down, praying that my Xaralite body would be able to hold out while I morphed again.

Going warp power. I concentrated. This would drain my energy, but it was better than suffocation.

In less than a second, I was Xaralite.

Another second.

I was a Yeerk.

I sank down, further, further, unable to...

To what?

My thoughts were muddled. Completely.

[Xilite! Ax! Hello! Talk to us!]

[Wha?]

[It's the Yeerk instincts,] Rachel said. [Fight them.]

[I'm not dealing with freaking Yeerk instincts!] I yelled. [I did a fast morph so I wouldn't run out of air and now I don't have the energy to breathe!]

[Oh. Well, hurry up.]

I sighed. Obviously they thought I meant that figuratively. But I was recovering, and I was flying upwards.

Ax was fully Andalite by now, and was struggling to keep from being buoyed up as he morphed. So the fast morph had its advantages.

[Okay, I'm by the pier. Is Jahar ready yet?]

Silence.

[Hellooooooooooooo? People? Come on, I can't exactly SEE what's going ON!]

An Andalite head was thrust under the surface. I could hear Alloran's screams. And far in the background, Jahar's.

I felt pity. But I was a warrior, and I wasn't supposed to feel pity, so I did nothing as I watched the Yeerk swim up...

_Father._

_Say nothing. He can't know that you're there. Say nothing._

_Father._

[RACHEL! JAKE! ANY-FREAKING-ONE! WHAT'S! GOING! ON!]

[They may not be able to hear you,] said the Yeerk, swimming up beside me.

The master of understatement. I resisted the impulse to yell at him, and instead continued yelling at the Animorphs.

[They're supposed to be backing US up!] I raged when I was fully convinced that they couldn't hear me. [WE'RE going to end up looking for the FIVE of THEM! Four humans and a freaking hawk!]

_You sound so human, Xilite. Are you turning into one of them?_

_I'm not human._

_"Freaking"? That sounds Xaralytic. Really._

_Go away._

[One of us should stay.]

[Okay. I'll wait for Jahar. Go try and find them.]

I knew how frightened he had to be, suddenly. He'd been infested. By all rights, he should probably stay and I should find the Animorphs.

But he was already swimming away, ready to do a quick demorph.

[Hey, Ax?]

[Yes?]

I should go. Not him. I should go.

It was one of those split-second decisions that I knew, suddenly, that I would regret.

But which action would I regret? Going, or staying?

[Don't go Andalite. Go insect or bat or something. Try and find them first,] I said finally.

[Of course. Be careful.]

[I wasn't planning on doing something stupid.]

He began to demorph.

I waited. Biding my time.

* * *

I was getting edgy. Fifteen minutes had passed. No sign of Jahar.

No sign of her! What had happened? _Had_ anything happened? Where were the Animorphs? Where was Ax? Had the hawk ratted on them? Were they all waiting for me, all Controllers?

No. I would have seen them being infested.

I would have recognized them.

Wouldn't I?

_Fifteen minutes more. Then you leave._

_Fifteen minutes._

And fifteen minutes was only a rough estimate. Xaralites didn't have that inner clockwork that the Andalites did. I'd have to try to do something to create an artificial substitute, when I went back to...

Stupid. The last thing I needed to be thinking of.

And if I was starting to forget even my language, the language I'd spoken all my life, how could I ever play with Xaralytic science again?

PAH-LOOOOOOSH!

I felt, rather than heard, the head being shoved under the surface.

Good. I needed a distraction.

I swam rapidly.

Another Yeerk was right beside me.

Had to beat her!

I swam faster. Faster!

Stretched...

Made it.

I was in.

The other Yeerk was going nuts, creating major disturbances in the water. But what could she do?

Nothing. I hoped.

[Hello, Andalite.] I struggled to overcome my natural repulsion of these creatures.

[Hello, visser.] It was a beaten voice, still full of hatred, that answered me. Pity welled up again, but, like my disgust, I ignored it.

[Not quite. Sorry to disappoint you, but Visser Four's still in the pool.] I flipped through her memories. Where was Tobias?

[What in –]

[Do you need it spelled out, Andalite? I'm the Xaralite captain everyone thinks is dead. When you're reinfested, as you probably will be when I find what I want, they'll know that it wasn't a renegade Xaralite posing as a captain in order to inspire fear, it was a renegade Xaralite captain who's been showing up on Earth.]

[Don't they already know that?] she said, curiously.

[They suppose,] I said harshly. [It'll be confirmed later. HOW do I find the others!?]

I winced. I hadn't meant to say that out loud.

[The hawk? The Andalite bandit?]

[Yeah. Him.] No need to tell her that they weren't Andalites.

[He is in a torturing room at the moment.]

[Has he sold his comrades out yet?]

[Not that I am aware of.]

I sneered. [Then I'd better get to him before he does.]

[Alloran! What about him?]

[What?] I said, distracted.

[Can you not free him as well?]

[This isn't a charity project. I'm controlling you because you're useful. He isn't. I'm not here to free all oppressed Andalites, since I happen to desire your race's destruction anyway.]

I felt her disappointment and started to reconsider. Then I mentally slapped myself. Bigger things to worry about.

I looked through her memories again. Where were the other "Andalites"?

I saw what I was looking for and my stomach clenched with dread.

_Great! Wonderful!_ I raged silently. _They're all in there with the hawk! If he doesn't sell them out, Cassie will! Perfect! AND I STILL DON'T KNOW WHERE THE ANDALITE IS!_

I looked for information on him, but Jahar hadn't noticed any animals flying _out_ of the Yeerk pool.

I glanced back at the pool. The Taxxons were still searching.

I headed for the chamber.

**

* * *

Chapter Eighteen – Visser Four

* * *

**

It had beaten me!

The Yeerk had entered my host! Mine! One of the only two Andalites ever to be used as hosts!

I wanted that host!

It had to be an Andalite. Had to be. An Andalite that wanted to find out Yeerk information by infesting MY host!

Or perhaps just an Andalite that felt pity for his comrades.

_Wait,_ I told myself. _The Xaralite. The captain._

It could be her. Or it could be one of the six famed Andalite bandits. Or one of the five, more accurately, since the hawk would crack soon enough.

A Hork-Bajir head was shoved under the surface. A Yeerk started to race forward.

Not happening. I could play the game as well as they.

I slid through the water. The other Yeerk didn't expect it. It wasn't ready.

The head jerked up just as I finished slithering in.

The Hork-Bajir was too stupid to even wonder why I wasn't its normal Yeerk. I sneered silently, having next to no use for stupid beings even if I did pity them occasionally.

[Ha HAH!] I yelped suddenly. The Andalites had come! Hah! They'd come to rescue their fallen comrade, and all through my plan!

Promotion. Yes, promotion. To Visser Three. Or perhaps even Visser Two!

And before long, to Visser One!

No. No. I was getting ahead of myself. First, it had to be insured that they could not flee. _Then_ I would be promoted. If they escaped, I would gain nothing.

I checked the memory again, the memory that the Hork-Bajir had guffawed happily at, supposing that his freedom drew near, until he saw them shot down by guards.

Pity.

Stupid emotion.

I pushed it away.

Four Andalites. All bats.

Another Andalite, also a bat, shot just as he started to disappear into one of the many sheds that filled the pool.

I paused. Five?

Five Andalites had been captured?

Plus the one, the hawk, that I'd already caught?

Six total.

Then what about...

My mind slowed. And then I laughed. Laughed silently, in thought speak, and then rose into audible laughter in the Hork-Bajir's voice.

[So it was the Xaralite!] I shouted gleefully. [Now all that remains is to find her, and I'll be promoted to the Council!]

The Hork-Bajir was confused, trying to understand.

[Don't waste your brainpower,] I told him scornfully.

Where could the Xaralite be?

_Of course,_ I laughed to myself.

_Look for your host._

**

* * *

Chapter Nineteen – Xilite

* * *

**

I looked around. A few Hork-Bajir made signs of deference when they saw me.

Ahh. Power. Even in another form, I had it.

_Don't be a fool, Xilite. They're not bowing to you, they're bowing to Visser Four. Get that through your thick head._

[Where are the Andalites?]

They looked confused. "_Haharfas_ in room."

I almost told them, in my uncertainty, why I was there. I "wanted to torture them." But then again...I was the superior. They had no right to question me. I could do what I wanted.

Power.

The word and all its meanings was intoxicating.

I brushed past them, testing my tail blade.

How long had passed since I'd entered this form?

Cold fear gripped me at the thought of death. I scoffed at my own fear, but then again, I had no wish to die in the midst of this mission. And if I stayed in this form over four hours...

I snarled in frustration for a moment, then said, reluctantly, [Jahar, how much time since I have infested you?]

[Approximately eleven minutes and forty-five seconds.]

Estimating that I'd morphed twenty minutes before that, I'd been in morph about thirty-one minutes. Almost thirty-two. Maybe more.

[Thanks,] I said uncertainly, not really knowing what to say to the doomed creature.

Perhaps something could be done. Perhaps she would not need to be reinfested.

Perhaps I should worry about that later.

Then again, I didn't owe her anything. I could have figured it out by searching her memories. That was all I had to do. I owed her nothing.

Nothing.

A portion of the wall seemed to have an indention. Big enough to be a door. Just the faintest outline of one.

I struck at it. It didn't move.

[Request permission to enter,] I said lamely, once again not knowing what to say.

Stupid! I should have looked through Jahar's memories. She would have known.

[UNAUTHORIZED ENTRY!] it shouted.

The Hork-Bajir swung around to face me.

My eyes glowed.

They sagged.

[Whoa! Cool! How did I do that?]

I wasn't a Xaralite! I was a Yeerk! I shouldn't be able to...

[It's impossible!] I raged, hardly realizing that I was speaking so she could hear me. [I've never been able to do that! These are _your_ eyes! Not mine!]

[Perhaps it has more to do with the mind than the eyes.]

[What would _you_ know of it?] I said harshly.

She fell silent, not knowing why I'd reacted like that. Of course, it was obvious. A lowly Andalite should not venture to offer her opinion to _me_.

_Calm down. You're losing it. Now, if you have this little power, use it on the computer._

Some kind of mechanism had to operate this. Some kind of mechanism. Some kind of computer.

My eyes glowed as I scanned the perimeter.

[Entry accepted.]

I stepped through to face about five Dracon beams, wielded by as many Hork-Bajir.

Stupid alarm.

I activated my power again. The lead Hork-Bajir simply handed his to me, and the rest shot each other.

On minimum. I had no reason to kill them yet.

[Hello.]

[Visser Four,] Ax accused.

[Oh, I'm hurt. None of you even recognize me,] I said sardonically. [Come on, how many glowing-eyed people do you know?]

[Oh. Hi, Xilite,] Rachel said. [Now let us out!]

I looked over. They were all in individual clear boxes that seemed to be holding cells. None appeared to be hurt.

Studying the array of things in that room, I could see that there were ample devices to hurt them if, by any chance, I failed.

I glared at the computer. The door slid shut behind me. I concentrated harder and hoped that I'd accomplished my object: To jam its circuits so it couldn't be opened again.

I shot at them with my beam.

[Ahhh!]

The beam ricocheted off Cassie's box and hit me in the face.

I yelped in pain, practically blinded.

I couldn't aim if I was blinded. That much was obvious. Therefore, I had to repair the damage.

I started to morph. I didn't know what I was morphing, and I didn't want to waste time finding out.

I reversed it and blinked, vision restored.

[Uhh...how _do_ I get you out?]

[I believe that there are computers operating these cells,] Ax stated. [No doubt they are linked to the large computer behind you.]

I turned around, realizing too late that I could have just used a stalk eye.

The cages opened.

[I jammed the lock. You can just demorph here.]

[Demorph, remorph,] Jake ordered. [We have to get out of here.]

[No argument there,] Marco said agreeably.

They were almost fully human (except Ax and Tobias) when the door opened.

My Dracon beam dropped. I could see smoke coming out of it.

It wouldn't be working any time soon.

I swung around.

"I believe you're using MY HOST."

I snapped a tail blade up. [Oh, am I? So sorry.] The door closed behind her, and I wondered briefly how she'd opened it in the first place.

Her eyes flickered. "You're the Xaralite. The captain."

I slashed in annoyance. [Don't waste my time telling me things I already know.]

She cocked her head and analyzed me. I did the same.

Weird. She made me feel...weird.

I knew her. Something about her was familiar, but only faintly, like I'd met her once and then never seen her again.

Of course. I'd passed her in the Yeerk pool when we were racing.

But...that wasn't it...was it?

Of course it was.

"So they're human," she said very calmly.

[In their human forms,] I retorted.

"Which happen to be their true forms."

[Hah! Do you imagine that _humans_ could do what they've done?]

I rotated a stalk eye. They weren't in battle morphs yet. They were still.

Too still.

She raised her gun and pointed it at me. "My personal invention. Do you like it? A gun that, instead of stunning, places the creature in a bio-stasis state and also creates a force field that conforms to its shape. The creature is still conscious and, if I have it set low, can even speak." She smiled fiercely. "Your little friends cannot."

[Far beyond Yeerk technnology. My compliments.]

I spoke calmly, raising my tail, notch by notch, into position.

She jerked. "Not so far beyond."

Why? Why did she suddenly look startled?

"Oh, yes, one more thing, Xaralite. Unlike a Dracon beam set to stun, this gun, if it touches even your hoof, will freeze your entire body. So stop raising that Andalite tail blade." Her mouth curved into a sinister Hork-Bajir grin. "It annoys me."

[Xilite.]

I jerked. Her finger tightened on the trigger.

[Warn me before you do that!]

[She missed me,] Ax explained. [I am doing my best imitation of bio-stasis. If I can be close enough...]

[Yes,] I said tightly. I'd have to take the risk. I'd have to distract her.

Of course, I was used to taking risks.

[That is a fascinating weapon,] I said, rather lamely. [The Xaralites have something like it.]

"Yes. The _schssli_ has a setting like this. I founded this on its principle."

Her eyes widened.

I stared at her. [How do you know of our –]

"Be silent!" she snapped.

Something about her compelled me to be so.

However, I did raise my tail blade.

She fired!

I immediately released Jahar and started to crawl away.

I hit a force field.

[AAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!] I screamed blindly.

[Xilite, what is it?!] Ax demanded.

[I'm trapped! She shot Jahar, encased her in a force field, and I can't get out! I can't get out!]

I was breathing hard. I couldn't think. Every ounce of claustrophobia that a Xaralite was capable of feeling rushed to my brain, and I slumped – as well as a Yeerk could.

I reached back into Jahar's mind.

Could I speak?

"I left you with your speech properties. We shall communicate. How else can I find out your little group's secrets?"

[Not my group,] I said automatically.

"No concern of mine. _Their_ little group's secrets, then."

[Ax, you ready yet?] I said privately. [I could use some help.]

She jerked a notch on the beam and fired at Jahar's head.

The pain! I reeled for a moment, then realized that the obstruction was gone.

"You will release MY HOST."

[No!] Jahar cried in my mind. [No!]

[Deal with it,] I said harshly. [I have other things to handle.]

[No! Kill me, don't leave me for –]

I didn't hear the rest of it. I was already crawling out.

I had a plan.

I landed on the ground and began to demorph.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Ax moving.

Her eyes were fixed on me.

I emerged from the filthy slug's body.

She stared at me for a long, long time. Then she lowered the beam and spoke in a quivering voice as I returned the stare with still more incredulousness.

"Xilite?"

"Of course," I said calmly. "You've heard of me."

"No...no, that's not it..." Her brow furrowed, and she relaxed her grip on the Dracon beam still more.

I narrowed my eyes, but not without that odd sensation again. The sensation of meeting someone you've met before, used to know so well, forgot, and suddenly meet again, unprepared.

"We've met before?" I offered.

"Yes," she said slowly.

It emanated from her. And suddenly I realized why it made me feel so strange.

I was face to face with myself.

I jerked back.

She didn't look like me, not in that Hork-Bajir form. She did not look like me at all. But her expression, her manner, her poise – everything else reminded me so strongly...

She studied me.

I studied her.

How could it possibly –

FWAPP!

Ax! I'd forgotten him!

His tail blade was at her throat.

"No!" I screamed. "No!"

He rotated one stalk eye to face me, obviously shocked. [Xilite?]

"No! Don't kill her!"

[She knows what they are,] he told me. [She cannot live.]

_My parents are Yeerks._

She was...

He slashed.

She jerked back, and the blow did not sever her head.

Blood did, however, stream down her neck in rapid streams as she fell to the ground.

I heard Thchi laugh.

*Now, what fun would it be if you figured it out, and she did not, my little Xairr? What fun would I have? And don't you want,* voice dripping sarcasm, *a last goodbye?*

I dropped to my knees beside her.

"Thchi, you can't take her..." she moaned, eyes closed.

"Mother! Mom, it's me!" My voice broke.

Her eyes opened slowly.

I was aware of the Animorphs' stares. They burned into me as I dropped my head and fought back tears, wondering why I even tried to fight them now.

"Xilite?" My mother grasped my hand.

"Mom!" I cried. "No, no, no!"

I'd found her! Found her, after all this time! She remembered me!

And she was dying!

"You lived," she said in disbelief.

"Thchi could not kill me," I said softly, finally beginning to calm down. "Mom, you have to get out of that body! It's dying!"

She tried. I could see her trying. But she finally closed her eyes again.

"Tell me..." she whispered. "About...you..."

I'd never see her again. Just this brief moment, and then...

"I..." I gasped, still trying to hold in the sobs. I didn't want her to die. And I certainly could not collect my scattered mind long enough to remember anything.

She must have felt my agony. I knew she could not see it, since she still lay with closed eyes.

"It's my time, Xilite. All of us enter the portal sometime." Her eyes fluttered open. "The Xaralites are conquered...aren't they."

"I failed. I..." I cut myself off. She didn't need to die hearing about my own failures. "Yes."

"Go back, Xilite." She made a weak smile. "Even if only to destroy them...'better a death in honor than a life of slavery.' "

"You remember," I breathed.

"Tell your father...that I still loved him...in the end," she murmured. "I know what he is...now."

I realized that Ax was stock-still behind me. Frozen. Did he realize yet what he'd done?

Hatred bubbled up inside me.

He should die.

He would die.

I would...

I turned my thoughts back to my dying mother. "I will tell him, Mother. And I will try to fulfill your last...your wish."

"I love you, Xilite. I always have. I always..."

"I love you, Mom," I whispered.

No pulse.

No heartbeat.

I burst into racking sobs, for the first time in my life.

I laid my face on her dead Hork-Bajir arm and cried.

"Mother," I forced out. "Don't go! MOM!"

No answer.

She was already gone.

The force fields were gradually wearing off the Animorphs. Rachel picked up Jahar in her trunk. They had no choice but to take her with them, not after what she had seen.

For a long, long time I lay there, stunned. Sobbing. Crying, and for the first time not caring that I was displaying weakness.

And when the Hork-Bajir finally came, getting past the computer, it required both the elephant and the gorilla to tear me away from the corpse that my mother had inhabited.

**

* * *

Chapter Twenty – Tobias

* * *

**

Jahar would stay with the Chee, in their underground palace, until we knew what to do with her. Most likely, she would stay there until she could find a way to get back to the Andalite home world.

Xilite had not spoken to any of us, and none of us had looked for her. But they had called a meeting – more to check on her than anything else – and Rachel had found Xilite. She was already there when I, the last to arrive, showed up.

I swooped down and landed on Rachel's shoulder.

Xilite was silent. No rage. No pain showed on her face. It was blank, void, stunned.

Still stunned, and it had been almost two days.

What was she stunned _at_? Finding her mother? Losing her?

Both?

I guess I expected her to scream. Expected her to explode at all of us, or just Ax. But her silence was so much more effective.

"Xilite," Rachel said finally. "I'm sorry...we should have done something..."

Xilite did not respond. Her expression did not change, even as Marco offered his own tentative sympathy.

"Rachel's right," he said, looking uncomfortable. He and Xilite weren't exactly close. He didn't know what to say.

"She's free, Xilite. However you remember her.. she was free in the end." Naturally, it was Cassie who said that.

Xilite's expression seemed almost bitter, with almost a flicker of pain now. Was she snapping out of her little world? Even to my own mind, my words felt harsh.

They also felt true.

"Xilite.. Xilite, she.." Jake trailed off, for the same reason Marco had. What he'd had in mind to say would have only made it worse.

Still, Ax had said nothing.

Neither had she.

Ax finally broke the still silence between them. [Xilite.. I did not know. Had I known..]

Her face was no longer expressionless. Her eyes were no longer dull. In fact, she looked as though she'd suddenly discovered hatred.

Not that she'd never known it before. I knew that. In my mind.

"You killed her, Aximili." Her voice's fury somehow dulled even before her formal words. "YOU killed her. How dare you over your _condolences_ over her death?!"

[She...she knew what they were...] His words lacked conviction. He now sounded almost as stunned as Xilite had looked.

Cassie laid her hand on his arm. "No way you could have known, Ax," she said softly.

"I can't believe it," Xilite muttered. Pain was evident on her face now. "Finally, I found..." Her head snapped up, a low growl beginning in her throat.

"I know how you feel," Marco began. "I...I know something about losing a mother myself..." He shook his head, as though he knew how empty his words sounded.

"At least your mother is ALIVE," Xilite practically spat. "At least she wasn't killed by an alien murderer. At least you didn't have to watch her die at the hands of..." Her eyes were flaming now. She bit her words back.

[Xilite...if there...if...I...] Ax was stumbling over his words. Xilite was calming herself visibly, but the look on her face did not soften.

"I'll avenge her, Andalite. And what better time to do it than –"

"Xilite, stop it," Jake snapped.

She wasn't listening. Her eyes were trained on Ax, on his throat.

Jake shot a glance at Cassie, the fastest morpher. She wasn't looking at him, though; she was staring at the scene. All of us were.

"Xilite, you can't bring her back by killing," Cassie said gently, starting to move forward. "Why celebrate her murder with more?"

She had almost reached them – with what intention, I didn't know – when Xilite bared her teeth and snarled. She raised a claw and brought it down where Ax had been not a full second before.

I dived, hit her, and blinded her.

She screamed in pain and fury and hatred.

"Xilite! Stop it! STOP IT!" Rachel yelled. "You're out of control!"

"Losing control, Xilite," Cassie said in a clear, calm voice. "Losing _control_."

That word penetrated to her being. Control. I shouldn't have been as surprised as I was.

She relaxed her tense muscles. Her face began to melt into that of a cat, then reversed, and her now-clear eyes roamed the barn.

She jerked back from us, embarrassed, no doubt.

There was a quivering silence.

"What?" she sneered finally. "No taunts? No mockery? No reminders of the fact that mighty Xilite lost it? You're all shocked enough, and none of you are good enough at hiding it."

"We wouldn't do that," Cassie told her softly. "We –"

She burst into harsh laughter. "You're all thrilled to see me made 'human.' I have faults. You pity me. You weren't able to pity me before. Tell me, Cassie, doesn't it make you feel relieved?"

"No." I could see that she was lying. Hopefully Xilite, in her state of anger and bitterness, could not.

"Oh, I forgot, you're the tree hugger," she jeered. "Death never relieves you, except when it benefits you – but this benefitted you, didn't it? You agree that she had to die. You agree. You're safe. You're safe, and that's all that matters!"

The last of her statement rose to a near scream.

_What can we say to that?_ I wondered. We were relieved. We were safe. And we agreed that she had to die.

It was safer that way.

Xilite was right.

[Xilite, I...I am so sorry,] Ax whispered.

Her shouted reply echoed through the barn.

"I hope you rot in hell!"

_So much for that romance,_ I thought before I could stop myself. I could almost see the same thoughts crossing Marco's mind.

Ax reeled back from the brutal statement, shock evident on his features. I saw the same shock, if in a lesser degree, on the faces of the others.

Xilite's glare traveled from his eyes to his throat.

She let out one last growl, then stormed past him to the barn door.

It was not until she left that Ax noticed the gash she'd sliced on his side in passing.

**

* * *

Chapter Twenty-one – Xilite

* * *

**

I did not cry when I returned to the large tree I had accepted as my home. I had cried all the tears that I possessed.

I had always wondered what it would be like to meet my mother.

I had never thought that it would be like this.

I wanted to kill him. I wanted to hear his dying screams. I wanted to...

I fought back the thoughts that had taken over my mind. Grappled with the rage that filled me. Tried to silence the hatred.

*Oh, I'm sorry. Did you want her alive that badly?*

"I said I'd avenge her death," I informed the snake. "I did not mean merely on the Andalite."

*I'd like to see you try.*

"You'll see much of that."

*Would you like to hear a little...proposal?* I could hear the anticipation in her voice. Could hear the laughter threatening to explode. Could hear the glee, the sadistic glee that filled her.

"You – it's your fault that she's dead!" I yelled. "How dare you offer _anything_!"

*I can make it worth your while.*

"I don't want to hear it!"

*But you do.*

"Monster!"

*And you're not, Xilite?* Her voice changed tones. *And you're not? Who was it that just tried to kill the creature that would have given his life for her? Who was it that abandoned herself to rage? Who was it that tried her best to hurt the only friends she had and was so blinded by hatred that she couldn't think straight?*

"They're not my friends!"

*Was that the main discrepancy in my statement? Do you acknowledge the rest to be true? Maybe I never could assume complete control of you, Xilite, I can admit that. But even _you_ must see that hatred has accomplished what I could not.*

She was perceptive.

"Talk."

*I can undo what the Andalite has done.*

"For what?" I demanded. "What's your price, snake?"

*You know what my price is.*

"Never."

*Ah, but I'm not finished. I can undo what you have done.*

"And the price raises with it, I assume?" I said with withering contempt.

*No. It does not. I can undo what I have done – that is, give you back your father. Your mother, your race, your father – all in exchange for one single favor.*

"To fight with you."

*There is a bit more to the deal than that... Oh, and one last thing, Xilite?*

My eyes narrowed. "What?"

*Think of what you could accomplish with this power.*

I nodded sharply. "What else do you want from me?"

*The Animorphs. Two of them is all I require. Only two.*

My mouth moved vainly. My brain struggled to comprehend what she was saying.

*What more can you ask for, Xaralite?*

_Nothing more. Just take away the price. I don't want to fight for you._

*You have nothing to lose. And you have everything to gain. Everything, Xaralite. I can undo it. You can be powerful. You have always wanted power, control. And you have always wanted a family.*

And then, at last, I spoke.


End file.
